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In recent times, popularity of dangerous sports has increased. Some people opine that these sports should be banned, I strongly agree to this point.

In recent times, popularity of dangerous sports has increased. Some people opine that these sports should be banned, I strongly agree to this point. kYx7N
It is true that public believe that there is a lot of risks involved in the hazardous game like Rugby, American football and bull wrestling where one can easily get injured and even lose a life, Rugby is almost similar to American football but played without safety equipment like helmet and shield to protect their Arms and legs. There were few cases while playing these sports where two or more persons collided with each other out of force, consequently many players have broken their bones which lead to long term disability. Sport like bull wrestling is not only risky to the people who play but also to the bull where both of them can be injured but mostly there is a chance that people may lose their lives or seriously injured. For instance, one can imagine how hard it would be if an 1800 pound bull hits a person's head where his brain is damaged or a body part is completely destroyed which could lead to terminal illness. Therefore, it is always good to ban such sports. On the other hand, some populations argue that it is good to play these sports where one ability will be identified and can be played with safety measures. so they can enhance their carrier. In Addition, the crowd believe that few of them can only play these sports according to their capabilities so that they earn money from it and survive. However, I don't agree with that because these days there are a lot of ways to earn money because putting their lives into danger is not at all worth it and also it can always be avoided. In conclusion, everyone has the right to play their own sport. nonetheless, nobody should put their lives in danger, Finally, I would like to say that I strongly agree with the point that dangerous sports should always be banned.
It is true that public believe that there is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risks
involved in the hazardous game like Rugby, American football and bull wrestling where one can
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
injured and even lose a life, Rugby is almost similar to American football
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
played without safety equipment like helmet and shield to protect their Arms and legs. There were few cases while playing these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
where two or more persons collided with each other out of force,
consequently
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
players have broken their bones which lead to long term disability.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Sport
like bull wrestling is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
risky to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
to the bull where both of them can
be injured
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
mostly
there is a chance that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
may lose their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
or
seriously
injured.
For instance
, one can imagine how
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
it would be if an
Writing for an international audience? Consider adding the metric equivalent.
1800 pound
bull hits a person's head where his brain
is damaged
or a body part is completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroyed
which could lead to terminal illness.
Therefore
, it is always
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
to ban such sports.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
populations argue that it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
where one ability will
be identified
and can
be played
with safety measures.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
so
they can enhance their carrier.
In Addition
, the crowd believe that few of them can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
according to their capabilities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they earn money from it and survive.
However
, I don't
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
these days there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
ways to earn money
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
putting their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
into
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
danger
is not at all worth it and
also
it can always
be avoided
.

In conclusion
, everyone has the right to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
nonetheless
, nobody should put their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
danger
,
Finally
, I would like to say that I
strongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the point that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
should always
be banned
.
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IELTS essay In recent times, popularity of dangerous sports has increased. Some people opine that these sports should be banned, I strongly agree to this point.

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
314 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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