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Computers have been introducing into classrooms for teaching purposes for many years.

Computers have been introducing into classrooms for teaching purposes for many years. m1XNn
Computers have been introducing into classrooms for teaching purposes for many years. It is undeniable that computers do bring a number of benefits as well as risks depending on the user. I agree that our education system has been massively changed after the era of computers in schools, colleges and universities. On one hand, computers help students and teachers with research and academic works. Instead of wasting time finding research data in libraries for several hours, we can easily click and download the data within a few minutes. As an example, there are many specific academic websites on the internet regarding health, business and politics from renowned researchers for high-quality references. Next, computers combined with the internet create effective communication between students and teachers in spite of different time and spaces. For example, students can share their homework, lessons and projects with each other via email and messaging over computers and phones. Moreover, online teaching programs from computers are evolved considerably during this covid era, and as an effect, we can save a lot of time, energy and money staying at home. On the other hand, it can be seen that young students kill their time watching many entertainment websites and applications such as youtube and Twitter. Having wasting time over the computer instead of studying, the students become lost their concentration on their academic works. Furthermore, a number of health problems such as obesity and nearsightedness can be developed. For example, researches showed that sitting too long in front of a desktop leads to an increased chance of eating and sleep disorders such as obesity and sleep apnoea syndrome. In my opinion, I believe that computers help students for high-quality academic works by changing the education system considerably.
Computers have been introducing into classrooms for teaching purposes for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
years. It is undeniable that computers do bring a number of benefits
as well
as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risks
depending on the user. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that our education system has been
massively
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
after the era of computers in schools, colleges and universities.

On one hand, computers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
and teachers with research and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
works.
Instead
of wasting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
finding research data in libraries for several hours, we can
easily
click and download the data within a few minutes. As an example, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
specific
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
websites on the internet regarding health, business and politics from renowned researchers for high-quality references.
Next
, computers combined with the internet create effective communication between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
and teachers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
in spite of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and spaces.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
can share their homework, lessons and projects with each other via email and messaging over computers and phones.
Moreover
, online teaching programs from computers
are evolved
considerably
during this
Did you mean "COVID-19" or the alternative spelling "Covid-19" (= coronavirus)?
covid
era, and as an effect, we can save
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
, energy and money staying at home.

On the other hand
, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
kill their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
watching
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
entertainment websites and applications such as
Possible spelling mistake found.
youtube
and Twitter. Having wasting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
over the computer
instead
of studying, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
become lost their concentration on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
works.
Furthermore
, a number of health problems such as obesity and nearsightedness can
be developed
.
For example
, researches
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
that sitting too long in front of a desktop leads to an increased chance of eating and sleep disorders such as obesity and sleep
Possible spelling mistake found.
apnoea
syndrome.

In my opinion, I believe that computers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
for high-quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
works by changing the education system
considerably
.

IELTS essay Computers have been introducing into classrooms for teaching purposes for many years.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
289 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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