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People consume more refined meals than they did many years ago.

People consume more refined meals than they did many years ago. This is because we lack the time to cook homemade dishes and this could be result in excessive weight gain. First of all, nowadays it can be seen that people are eating lots of fast foods and different kind of expensive and processed meals. Every day we work hardly, trying to earn lots of money and we have not got any time for cooking at all, so that we want to eat appropriate meals in restaurants or places like that. However, in past times there weren’t any kind of different meals, they used to eat only similar meals. Recent studies show that many residents want to eat out. So they can do their jobs effectively. The primary effect of eating refined meals is about the time which we spend cooking different kind of meals. We are expected to work more to earn lots of money. Every single man or woman wants to be as a free person for each field. This means they want to freedom for themselves for instance from financial side. They work more and more for getting enough money to be free from the side. It is said that if you are free from financial you can do anything in this life which you want. From that point of view, people tend to eat more processed food. In conclusion, we can say that according to the both views, comparing time and money, we are eating more processed foods. We didn’t have time eating restaurants or expensive places.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
consume more refined
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meals
than they did
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
years ago. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
we lack the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to cook homemade dishes and this could be result in excessive weight gain.

Often, this adverbial phrase is redundant. Consider using “first”.
First of all
, nowadays it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eating
lots of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
foods and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
kind of expensive and processed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meals
. Every day we
The adverb ‘hardly’ is usually put before the verb ‘work’.
work hardly
, trying to earn lots of
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
money and
we have not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for cooking at all,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eat
appropriate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meals
in restaurants or places like that.
However
, in past
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
there weren’t any kind of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meals
, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eat
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
similar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meals
. Recent studies
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
residents
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eat
out.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
they can do their jobs
effectively
.

The primary effect of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eating
refined
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meals
is about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
which we spend cooking
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
kind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meals
. We are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expected
to work more to earn lots of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
. Every single
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
or woman
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wants
to be as a free person for each field. This means they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
to freedom for themselves
for instance
from financial side. They work more and more for getting
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to be free from the side. It
is said
that if you are free from financial you can do anything in this life which you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
. From that point of view,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
tend to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eat
more processed food.

In conclusion
, we can say that according to the both views, comparing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
, we are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eating
more processed foods. We didn’t have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eating
restaurants or expensive places.
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IELTS essay People consume more refined meals than they did many years ago.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
261 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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