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people believe that we have many choices

people believe that we have many choices ldMXb
It is believed these days that we have a lot of choices in life, the question is how we use these choices and make a benifet from it? in this article i am going to give my honest opinion. some people believe that they have lack of choices caused by an bad experince or failure, but the truth is if one door closes there are many doors that is open for you, i agree on that because of many reasons, firstly the world is big and full of opportonities we have to see the bigger picture of it, for instance if someone lost an job offer they get upset and they think they are losres but the truth is there are many job to apply to not only this one. secondly there are many things in life that you can use and benifet from it, such as applying to schools that teaches skills like cooking or desgining therfore you can open your own buisness with only a small knowledge on it. thirdly if people take advantges of any important chance they will succeed and grow by the time. in other words some people do not get accepted into colleage so they can do something else, for instance starting a new store or an online shop. to summarize i think that the world is bigger than us and it is full with choices and many things, so people must know that failing at something does not mean that the world is closed but in the opposite if they open thier eyes they will see a lot of choices.
It
is believed
these days that we have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
choices
in life, the question is how we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
these
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choices
and
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make
a
Possible spelling mistake found.
benifet
from it?
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
in
this article
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
am going to give my honest opinion.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that they have lack of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
choices
caused by
Use "a" instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
an
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
Possible spelling mistake found.
experince
or failure,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the truth is if one door closes there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
doors
that is
open for you,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
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agree
on that
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because
of
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many
reasons,
firstly
the world is
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big
and full of
Possible spelling mistake found.
opportonities
we
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the bigger picture of it,
for instance
if someone lost
Use "a" instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
an
job offer they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
upset and
they
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think
they are
Possible spelling mistake found.
losres
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the truth is there are
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many
Possible agreement error. Did you mean "jobs"?
job
to apply to not
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only
this one.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
secondly
there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
things in life that you can
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use
and
Possible spelling mistake found.
benifet
from it, such as applying to schools that teaches
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
like cooking or
Possible spelling mistake found.
desgining
Possible spelling mistake found.
therfore
you can open your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
Possible spelling mistake found.
buisness
with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
knowledge on it.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
thirdly
if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
take
Possible spelling mistake found.
advantges
of any
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important
chance they will succeed and grow by the time.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
in
other words
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not
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get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
accepted
into colleage
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they can do something else,
for instance
starting a new store or an online shop.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
to
summarize
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that the world is bigger than us and it is
The usual collocation for "full" is "of" not "with". Did you mean "full of"?
full with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
choices
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
things,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
know that failing at something does not mean that the world
is closed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in the opposite if they open
Possible spelling mistake found.
thier
eyes they will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
choices
.
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IELTS essay people believe that we have many choices

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
267 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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