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bullying is a big problem

bullying is a big problem LG5LV
The educational system has evolved over ages. The concept of co-education and single sex schools are the foundation of schooling system. The problem of bullying however is a common problem in both the systems having its roots with the type of upbringing a child goes through. Bullying is pre-dominant where a child is not exposed enough to different culturals, morals, social and economic backgrounds. A child should be raised by educating him/her on the above factors to inculcate a sense of diversity coming from the various ethinicities in the world. If a child is not educted on these he/she feels a weird thing about someone and trys to mock other children on such moral grounds. Bullying has been most common in high schools where people experience a difference in their physical structures or mental behaviours. Very often these are related to certain backgrounds which the bulliers fail to understand and constantly keep mocking and teasing the softer ones. I have seen some examples related to one's physical apperance where a healthy girl was called by names like fatty, balloon so on and so forth. This is added to her underconfident behaviour, which was then carried forward in future. She was always embarassed and had a low esteem. The boys bullying however had a sense of satisfaction in pointing her incapabiliies. In this case there is a lack of undestanding in the bullier's mind about the different sizes an individual can have. Also, noticed some people getting bullied on moral grounds like having single parents or gay parents. This shows a lack of acceptance of different sex groups. This problem is persistent in both the developed as well as developing nations. In order to reduce or erradicate these behaviours the basic should begin at home by parents, guiding the child through socio-economic diversities, educating them on different cultures and keeping humanity at the peak. The ultimate epitome is that all men are equal and that shape, size, intelligence, moral backgrounds are all a part and parcel of one's existence. It should be taught to a child that bullying can cause serious mental and physical threats and can lead to heavy damages to the victims. Schools should also built strict policies related to anti-bulling in order to maintain the mental health of one and all. Campaigns and seminars on cases that have occured in past can be used to demonstrate the required behaviours and educate the students to have a clean approach with no bullying or mocking.
The educational system has evolved over ages. The concept of co-education and single sex schools are the foundation of schooling system.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
The
problem of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bullying
however
is a common problem in both the systems having its roots with the type of upbringing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
goes through.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Bullying
is
Possible spelling mistake found.
pre-dominant
where a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
is not exposed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
Possible spelling mistake found.
culturals
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
morals
, social and economic backgrounds. A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
should
be raised
by educating him/her on the above factors to inculcate a sense of diversity coming from the various
Possible spelling mistake found.
ethinicities
in the world. If a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
is not
Possible spelling mistake found.
educted
on these he/she feels a weird thing about someone and
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "tries", the plural form of the noun 'try'?
trys
to mock other children on such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
moral
grounds.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Bullying
has been most common in high schools where
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
experience a difference in their physical structures or mental
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviours' is British English.
behaviours
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
these
are related
to certain backgrounds which the
Possible spelling mistake found.
bulliers
fail to understand and
constantly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
mocking and teasing the softer ones. I have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
examples related to one's physical
Possible spelling mistake found.
apperance
where a healthy girl
was called
by names like fatty, balloon
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
forth. This is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
added
to her
Possible spelling mistake found.
underconfident
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
, which was then carried forward
Did you mean: "in the future"?
in future
. She was always
Possible spelling mistake found.
embarassed
and had a low esteem. The boys
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bullying
however
had a sense of satisfaction in pointing her
Possible spelling mistake found.
incapabiliies
.
In this case
there is a lack of
Possible spelling mistake found.
undestanding
in the
Possible spelling mistake found.
bullier
's mind about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
sizes an individual can have.
Also
, noticed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
getting bullied on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
moral
grounds like having single parents or gay parents. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
a lack of acceptance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
sex groups.

This problem is persistent in both the developed
Probable usage error. Use "and" after 'both'.
as well as
developing nations. In order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
or
Possible spelling mistake found.
erradicate
these
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviours' is British English.
behaviours
the basic should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
at home by parents, guiding the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
through
Possible spelling mistake found.
socio-economic
diversities, educating them on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
cultures and keeping humanity at the peak. The ultimate epitome is that all
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
are equal and that shape, size, intelligence,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
moral
backgrounds are all a part and parcel of one's existence. It should
be taught
to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bullying
can cause serious mental and physical threats and can lead to heavy damages to the victims. Schools should
also
The verb 'should' requires the base form of the verb: "build"
built
strict policies related to anti-bulling in order to maintain the mental health of one and all. Campaigns and seminars on cases that have
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "occurred", the past tense form of the verb 'occur'?
occured
in past can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to demonstrate the required
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviours' is British English.
behaviours
and educate the students to have a clean approach with no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bullying
or mocking.
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IELTS essay bullying is a big problem

Essay
  American English
2 paragraphs
415 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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