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People are taking more and more of sugar-based drinks .why?can the use of these drinks reduced ?

People are taking more and more of sugar-based drinks. why? can the use of these drinks reduced? BYbbX
In this modern era, everyone seeks to manifest their richness in which sugar-based drink plays an important role. There has been a significant inclination in the use of aerated drinks by the people. This essay will describe about the various reasons with some solution government can take to reduce the consumption of cold-drinks. To commence with, the most relevant answer to this question that, why people take these drinks is because of the taste of these drinks and the affordable prices. People take these drinks because of the taste and the effervescent effect of it, which is loved by everyone and is recommended at every place like: parties, occasions and many more. They discern it refreshing and an instant energy booster which is generally because of the carbon dioxide gas pressured in it. Further, there are a significant number of renowned personalities who endorse these carbonated drinks with various amount of flavours, because of which the people in the society gets influenced by these endorsements and start preferring the beverages. Attributing with unfavorable impact on everyone such as: cancer, sugar and many more. On the other hand, there are some significant number of ways by which the government can help in the declination of the increase in the use of such soft-drinks. They can promote and spread awareness about the healthy living lifestyle by running campaign in the public places, telling the harmful effects of these drinks on the body and replacing these beverages with the healthy drinks such as: natural juices, fruit shakes and many more. So that, people can become aware of the positive affects of these natural drinks on their body. Moreover, it is necessary for the Government to ban the endorsements of these drinks by various famous personalities. So that, the people will not be influenced by them and there could be a significant decrease in the marketing of the aerated drinks. Therefore, these are some remedial actions to decrease the intake of carbonated drinks. To conclude, there are several steps government can take to reduce the use of such beverages and promote healthy drinks, yet it is everyone's responsibility to adopt a healthy lifestyle and replace these drinks with natural juices.
In this modern era, everyone seeks to manifest their richness in which sugar-based
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drink
plays an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role. There has been a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
significant
inclination in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of aerated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. This essay will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
describe
about the various reasons with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
solution
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
can take to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the consumption of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cold
-drinks.

To commence with, the most relevant answer to this question that, why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
take these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the taste of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
and the affordable prices.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
take these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the taste and the effervescent effect of it, which is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
loved
by everyone and
is recommended
at every place like: parties, occasions and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more. They discern it refreshing and an instant energy booster which is
generally
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the carbon dioxide gas pressured in it.
Further
, there are a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
significant
number of renowned personalities who endorse these carbonated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
with various amount of
Possible spelling mistake. 'flavours' is British English.
flavours
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of which the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in the society
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
influenced by these endorsements and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
preferring the beverages. Attributing with unfavorable impact on everyone such as: cancer, sugar and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more.

On the other hand
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
significant
number of ways by which the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in the declination of the increase in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of such soft-drinks. They can promote and spread awareness about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
living lifestyle by running campaign in the public places, telling the harmful effects of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
on the body and replacing these beverages with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
such as: natural juices, fruit shakes and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can become aware of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
affects of these natural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
on their body.
Moreover
, it is necessary for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
to ban the endorsements of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
by various
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
personalities.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
that, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will not
be influenced
by them and there could be a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
significant
decrease in the marketing of the aerated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
.
Therefore
, these are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
remedial actions to decrease the intake of carbonated drinks.

To conclude
, there are several steps
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
can take to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of such beverages and promote
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
,
yet
it is everyone's responsibility to adopt a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
lifestyle and replace these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
with natural juices.
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IELTS essay People are taking more and more of sugar-based drinks. why? can the use of these drinks reduced?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
366 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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