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People are living longer. Some people think that it causes big problems. Others, however, think the aging population has many advantages for business, government and for society in general. 2

People are living longer. Some people think that it causes big problems. Others, however, think the aging population has many advantages for business, government and for society in general. 2 VBlWD
Lots of important changes are acheived in last years in the caring of elderly. Now there are economic and for elderly Who can’t pay for their medical cure. Furthermore there is the possibility to assume someone to take care of your older relatives. About jobs we can say that modern jobs aren’t physical as the older ones, infact now biggest part of the job don’t ne ed physical force but they can still be bad for your Health, for example if they take a long time in front of an electronic device that can create problem to eyes. But generrally the health situation on work has improved a lot. So in conclusion I think that the changes which Makes our lives longer and healtier means that they have a healtier live and heltier habits. The only type of problem are economica problems, infact the long lives of the elderly cause less work possibilites for young people, and involve higher expenses for pensions.
Lots of
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important
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changes
are
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acheived
in last years in the caring of elderly.
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Now
there are economic and for elderly Who can’t pay for their medical cure.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Furthermore
there is the possibility to assume someone to take care of your older relatives.

About
The comma is probably missing here: "jobs, we".
jobs we
can say that modern jobs aren’t physical as the older ones,
Possible spelling mistake found.
infact
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now
biggest part of the job don’t
Did you mean "né", "me", or "no"?
ne
ed physical force
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but
they can
still
be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
for your Health,
for example
if they take a long time in front of an electronic device that can create problem to eyes.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
Possible spelling mistake found.
generrally
the health situation on work has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
a lot.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
in conclusion
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Makes
our
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lives
longer and
Possible spelling mistake found.
healtier
means that they have a
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healtier
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
and
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heltier
habits. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
type of problem are
Possible spelling mistake found.
economica
problems,
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infact
the long
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
of the elderly cause less work
Possible spelling mistake found.
possibilites
for young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, and involve higher expenses for pensions.
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IELTS essay People are living longer. Some people think that it causes big problems. Others, however, think the aging population has many advantages for business, government and for society in general. 2

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
162 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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