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Patriotic people live in everywhere

Patriotic people live in everywhere 06JlG

Being lunatic about the homeland is causing The veins of the people of a country. We must always have the valor to love our homeland Also, do not worship idols and confine your thoughts due to disputes You never have to jest about patriotic issues And every day we take an effective step for the fertility and uneventful progress our country So that we do not have any idle people in the society and we see commuters every day in our country

Being lunatic about the homeland is causing The veins of the This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :individualsnationsociety
people
 of a country. We This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :require
must
 always have the valor to This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :admireadore
love
 our homeland Also
, do not worship idols and confine your thoughts due to disputes You never This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:ought to
have to
 jest about patriotic issues And every day we take an effective step for the fertility and uneventful progress our country This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:consequently
So
 that we do not have any idle This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :individualsnationsociety
people
 in the Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).society, and
society and
 we This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :witness
see
 commuters every day in our Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraphcountry.country!country?country:country,country;
country

IELTS essay Patriotic people live in everywhere

Essay

American English

1 paragraphs

81 words

This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1

4.0

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
?
One main idea per paragraph
Include an introduction and conclusion
Support main points with an explanation and then an example
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Vary your linking phrases using synonyms

Lexical Resource: 6.5

Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
Check your writing for errors

Task Achievement: 5.5

Answer all parts of the question
?
Present relevant ideas
Fully explain these ideas
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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