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Parents, particularly mothers, do not go to work to take care of family. Some people say that the government should give some money to those parents. do you agree or disagree with the satement? give reasons to your answers and give example to support your views.

Parents, particularly mothers, do not go to work to take care of family. Some people say that the government should give some money to those parents. with the satement? give reasons to your answers and give example to support your views. pRab9
People often argue that parents who do not opt for a job due to family responsibility should get some amount of money form the authority, This essay would disagree with the above statement, though some exemption should be made for those parents under certain circumstances. Firstly, this essay would discuss why giving to unemployed mother considered an unfairness to those who job, and secondly, how it can affect the nation's economy. To start with, the prime reason why the authority should not provide money to those who do not go to work could be unfairness to those who works day and night for their family. The reason is that by not working, unemployed parents are not contributing towards the nation's development, it is those who work hard should be getting these benefits from the authority. Though under a certain situation, it is necessary to provide money to those parents who do not work, such as who do not have any other family member who can look after their family. For example, a recent survey showed that 59% of the working parents vocalised that they are not satisfied by the government as they provide money to not working parents. Additionally, not working parents create more burden on the government. Because they are not paying any taxes to them and still they are getting benefits for the regime. The regime should have enough funds to support those unemployed parents. but they are not paying taxes, government revenue would decline and this would increase pressure on working parents. Consequently, the nation's economy will fall considerably day by day. Thus, to avoid this unfortunate circumstance, the regime should not pay any money to not working parents. In conclusion, although paying money to not working parents would help them to support their family expense, but it would also bring down the country's economy, which should not be negotiated.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
argue that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
do not opt for a job due to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
responsibility should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
form the authority, This essay would disagree with the above statement, though
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
exemption should
be made
for those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
under certain circumstances.
Firstly
, this essay would discuss why giving to unemployed mother considered an unfairness to those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
job, and
secondly
, how it can affect the nation's economy.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with, the prime reason why the authority should not provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
do not go to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
could be unfairness to those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
works day and night for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
. The reason is that by not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
, unemployed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
are not contributing towards the nation's development, it is those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
should be getting these benefits from the authority. Though under a certain situation, it is necessary to provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
do not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
, such as
Did you mean "whom"?
who
do not have any other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
member
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
can look after their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
.
For example
, a recent survey
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
that 59% of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
Possible spelling mistake. 'vocalised' is British English.
vocalised
that they are not satisfied by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
as they provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
parents.

Additionally
, not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
create more burden on the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
they are not paying any taxes to them and
still
they are getting benefits for the regime. The regime should have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
funds to support those unemployed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
.
Use a comma before 'but' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
but
they are not paying taxes,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
revenue would decline and this would increase pressure on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
.
Consequently
, the nation's economy will fall
considerably
day by day.
Thus
, to avoid this unfortunate circumstance, the regime should not pay any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
parents.

In conclusion
, although paying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to support their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
expense,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it would
also
bring down the country's economy, which should not
be negotiated
.
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IELTS essay Parents, particularly mothers, do not go to work to take care of family. Some people say that the government should give some money to those parents. with the satement? give reasons to your answers and give example to support your views.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
313 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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