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Parents can let children play age-approriage games. Instead of interacting with computers at an early age, parents should give children exposure to comics or reading to help them think and develop their best intellect.

Parents can let children play age-approriage games. Instead of interacting with computers at an early age, parents should give children exposure to comics or reading to help them think and develop their best intellect. obRwV
In addition, computers are useful, convenient tools and we can easily capture information quickly. Therefore, computers are an important part of our modern life. However, children use computers at a very early to affect the intellectual development of children. Not only that, but there are many other harms. One of the negative effects of use computer at a very early is their intellectual development will be limiting. When children play computers too much, their thought and their actions directed at the game that makes their imagination shrink. This causes the children thinking development as well as creativity to be significantly reduced. Many scientists have voiced warnings about the fact that exists in many families: Some babies who are only 6 months old have been allowed to be friends with tablets for hours. In a study by the Association of Pediatrics (PAS), 1 in 3 children know how to activate software on a smartphone or tablet before they even speak the first word. Another primary influence of use computers early is to affect a children vision. Using a computer, especially playing games, the constant movement images are that children must monitor the observations so that they can suffer from eye strain, eye aches, headaches, possible myopic disabilities, asym long-sightedness. . . . . In addition, when exposed to these devices too much, the waves of electricity released can adversely affect the health of the child. Parents should not give children too early contact with the computer. those things can affect a child's health and intellect. Parents can let children play age-approriage games. Instead of interacting with computers at an early age, parents should give children exposure to comics or reading to help them think and develop their best intellect.
In addition
, computers are useful, convenient
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
tools and
we can
easily
capture information
quickly
.
Therefore
, computers are an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
part of our modern life.
However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
computers at a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
early
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
affect
the intellectual development of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. Not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
that,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
other harms.

One of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
computer at a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
early
is their intellectual development will be limiting. When
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
play computers too much, their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
and their actions directed at the game that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
their imagination shrink. This causes the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
thinking development
as well
as creativity to be
significantly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
scientists have voiced warnings about the fact that exists in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
families:
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
babies who are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
6 months
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
have been
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to be friends with tablets for hours. In a study by the Association of Pediatrics (PAS), 1 in 3
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
know how to activate software on a smartphone or tablet
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
they even speak the
first
word.

Another primary influence of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
computers
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
early
is to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
affect
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
vision. Using a computer,
especially
playing games, the constant movement images are that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
monitor the observations
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they can suffer from eye strain, eye aches, headaches, possible myopic disabilities,
Possible spelling mistake found.
asym
Possible spelling mistake found.
long-sightedness
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
In addition
, when exposed to these devices too much, the waves of electricity released can
adversely
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
affect
the health of the child.

Parents should not give
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
too
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
early
contact with the computer.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
those
things can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
affect
a child's health and intellect. Parents can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
play
Possible spelling mistake found.
age-approriage
games.
Instead
of interacting with computers at an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
early
age, parents should give
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
exposure to comics or reading to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
and develop their best intellect.
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IELTS essay Parents can let children play age-approriage games. Instead of interacting with computers at an early age, parents should give children exposure to comics or reading to help them think and develop their best intellect.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
288 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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