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Parents are increasing getting worried about poor behaviour of their children . Do children better when they are physically punished or rewarded.

Parents are increasing getting worried about poor behaviour of their children. Do children better when they are physically punished or rewarded. 9aVmW
Nowadays, a number of parents increase who are concerned about negative attitude of their children. I think giving prize is praiseworthy step for promoting postive behaviour rather than complling physicals or verbal punishment for juveniles. The primary reason why rewards are necessary in order to improve discipline in young people is bolstering the interest of them for achieving appreciation from society as well as parents. The young achieve prize either intrinsically or extrinsically, which makes them more enthusiastic for winning rewards. As with former way they are more likely to enjoy Praise and with latter they also more tangible in a bid to obtain rewards such as pencils and pens. For instance. According to a poll conducted by Hardward University, by recognising the value of reward sixty-five percentage children are more likely to be encouraged for participating in competition as compared to past years due to prize. Hence, this second to none way to ensure the positive behavior in children for parents. Moreover, rewards are significant useful for changing the attitude of youngsters instead of scolding them. When parents punish with different methods, their behaviour not only become agressive but also they become stubborn. In other wards, corporal punishment also put impacts the relationships with their family in a long run. For example, according to research on 100 offsprings, 80 behaive well just because of parents include rewards by learning better parenting skill. Thus, appreciating strategy have an edge over punishment, since punishment not show long lasting effects for improving behaviour. In conclusion, although bad attitude of offsprings has bacome a alarming issue for many parents, they can motivate them by providing prize rather than punishing them.
Nowadays, a number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
increase who
are concerned
about
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
attitude of their children. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
giving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prize
is praiseworthy step for promoting
Possible spelling mistake found.
postive
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
rather
than
Possible spelling mistake found.
complling
physicals or verbal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
for juveniles. The primary reason why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rewards
are necessary in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
discipline in young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
is
bolstering the interest of them for achieving appreciation from society
as well
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
. The young achieve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prize
either
intrinsically
or
extrinsically
, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
them more enthusiastic for winning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rewards
. As with former way they are more likely to enjoy Praise and with latter they
also
more tangible in a bid to obtain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rewards
such as pencils and pens.
For instance
. According to a poll conducted by
Possible spelling mistake found.
Hardward
University, by
Possible spelling mistake. 'recognising' is British English.
recognising
the value of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reward
sixty-five percentage children are more likely to
be encouraged
for participating in competition as compared to past years due to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prize
.
Hence
, this second to none way to ensure the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
behavior in children for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rewards
are significant useful for changing the attitude of youngsters
instead
of scolding them. When
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
punish with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
methods, their
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
become
Possible spelling mistake found.
agressive
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
they become stubborn. In other wards, corporal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
also
put impacts the relationships with their family in a long run.
For example
, according to research on 100
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "offspring", the plural form of the noun 'offspring'?
offsprings
, 80
Possible spelling mistake found.
behaive
well
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
include
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rewards
by learning better parenting
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
.
Thus
, appreciating strategy have an edge over
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
, since
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
long lasting
effects for improving
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
.
In conclusion
, although
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
attitude of
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "offspring", the plural form of the noun 'offspring'?
offsprings
has
Possible spelling mistake found.
bacome
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
alarming issue for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
, they can motivate them by providing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prize
rather
than punishing them.
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IELTS essay Parents are increasing getting worried about poor behaviour of their children. Do children better when they are physically punished or rewarded.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
277 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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  • Meet the criteria
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