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Pacific and the related in sport

Pacific and the related in sport BLVY5
Throughout the millennia, the pacific is always a sensitive topic in politics that the government never stops considering. Although almost all nations in the world have negotiated agreements to address any dispute in peace, numerous countries nowadays still have territorial tension that can’t be abated. However, with the explosion of interest in sports, sports exchanges have brought the nations closer recently. Sport is an aspect of entertainment, but it is also a developing tool. In sport, we have to follow the sport's principles like discipline, cooperation, equality, and respect for adversaries. Through it, players can learn the way to cooperate, sympathize and respect others who come from different nations. For example, in the recent AFF cup battle, one participant in our adversity team was injured. But, his teammate, unfortunately, kicked the ball toward him. Luckily, our team deterred the kick to help our adversary. It’s a respectful act to show our respect to the opposing team’s nation. And, through the sport, nations can easily understand each other. Sport brings the trait of the country. So, when we play sports with other nations or watch it, we can understand more about them. Furthermore, we can learn from the opposing team to enhance our skills. All of us need to learn and no one can have enough knowledge. Playing with other nations is a perfect way to learn from them. When we sympathize and learn from them, our relationship will be better, our tension will be abated. In contrast, some circumstances are using sport for adverse purposes. In some cases, sport is a way to reveal our patriotism, but some people use sport to show their pride in their country in an adverse method. Those people are called “nationalism”. They are the toxic patriots. To illustrate, we just need to see the reaction of a Vietnamese on the Internet world when VietNam loses a sports game. They threaten the referee of that match and even hack the Facebook account of the referee. Because of that act, VietNam was rated as the 5th out of 25 uncivilized countries online. Long story short, sports games can abate tension between 2 nations in many ways. It's the best method to bring 2 nations together by showing sympathy and respect. In contrast, it can bring more tension in some cases of nationalism, so it’s better if the government takes this circumstance into account to have the best method to handle it before it brings more tension to us. Sport brings peace if we do it in the right way.
Throughout the millennia, the pacific is always a sensitive topic in politics that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
never
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stops
considering. Although almost all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
in the world have negotiated agreements to address any dispute in peace, numerous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
nowadays
still
have territorial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tension
that can’t
be abated
.
However
, with the explosion of interest in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
exchanges have brought the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
closer recently.

Sport is an aspect of entertainment,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it is
also
a developing tool. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
, we
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
follow the sport's principles like discipline, cooperation, equality, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
respect
for adversaries. Through it, players can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
the way to cooperate, sympathize and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
respect
others who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
.
For example
, in the recent AFF cup battle, one participant in our adversity
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
team
was injured
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, his teammate, unfortunately, kicked the ball toward him. Luckily, our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
team
deterred the kick to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
our adversary. It’s a respectful act to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
respect
to the opposing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
team’s
nation.

And, through the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
can
easily
understand each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Sport
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
brings
the trait of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, when we play
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
it, we can understand more about them.
Furthermore
, we can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
from the opposing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
team
to enhance our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
. All of us need to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
and no one can have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
knowledge. Playing with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
is a perfect way to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
from them. When we sympathize and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
from them, our relationship will be better, our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tension
will
be abated
.

In contrast
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
circumstances are using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
for adverse purposes. In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
cases,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
is a way to reveal our patriotism,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
their pride in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
in an adverse method. Those
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are called
“nationalism”. They are the toxic patriots. To illustrate, we
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
need to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the reaction of a Vietnamese on the Internet world when
Possible spelling mistake found.
VietNam
loses a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
game. They threaten the referee of that match and even hack the Facebook account of the referee.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
of that act,
Possible spelling mistake found.
VietNam
was rated
as the 5th out of 25 uncivilized
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
online.

Long story short,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
games can abate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tension
between 2
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ways. It's the best method to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bring
2
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
together by showing sympathy and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
respect
.
In contrast
, it can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bring
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tension
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
cases of nationalism,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it’s better if the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
takes this circumstance into account to have the best method to handle it
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
brings
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tension
to us.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Sport
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
brings
peace if we do it in the right way.
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IELTS essay Pacific and the related in sport

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
423 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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