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Our childhood memories we discussed today

Our childhood memories we discussed today Bw1Rj
I was born in Iwakuni city, Yamaguchi. I had lived there until I came here. When I was an elementary school student, I used to play outside with my friends afterschool. I would usually go to a park near the school by bike as soon as I arrived at my home. I remember we took joy in talking a lot and laughed with ease. Fortunately, I still have gotten along with some of my friends at that time. Next, let me introduce my classmates’ memories in their childhood. Momoe said she failed to attend an entrance ceremony when she was in elementary school. This is because she was nervous about new school life. In fact, she told their parents a lie that she had a stomachache then. Koto was obsessed with coloring books. She said that those reminds her of her childhood. Yuya mentioned he would like swimming. I was surprised to hear that he can barely swim 50 meters even now.
I
was born
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
Iwakuni
city, Yamaguchi. I had
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lived
there until I came here. When I was an elementary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
student, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to play outside with my friends
Possible spelling mistake found.
afterschool
. I would
usually
go to a park near the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
by bike as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
as I arrived at my home. I remember we took joy in talking a lot and laughed with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
.
Fortunately
, I
still
have gotten along with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of my friends at that time.

Next
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
me introduce my classmates’ memories in their childhood.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Momoe
said she failed to attend an entrance ceremony when she was in elementary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
she was nervous about new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
life. In fact, she
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
told
their parents a lie that she had a stomachache then.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Koto
was obsessed
with coloring books. She said that
The verb 'reminds' is singular. Did you mean: "This reminds" or "those remind"?
those reminds
her of her childhood.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Yuya
mentioned he would like swimming. I
was surprised
to hear that he can
barely
swim 50 meters even
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
.

IELTS essay Our childhood memories we discussed today

Essay
  American English
2 paragraphs
162 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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