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Others believe that it is better to work for an organization or company. In my opinion, the benefits of running people's own company can outweigh the drawbacks.

Others believe that it is better to work for an organization or company. In my opinion, the benefits of running people's own company can outweigh the drawbacks. 6axE0
Everyone will have their own orientation in their life. Some people choose to start a business by starting their own company. Others believe that it is better to work for an organization or company. In my opinion, the benefits of running people's own company can outweigh the drawbacks. On the one hand, we must acknowledge that running one's own business can pose a number of threats. Firstly, even if you have ambitions and dreams, getting a solid initial capital to start a company is really a big deal. In particularly, when newly established, the company needs a huge amount of capital to be able to go into operation. For example, physical capital includes the system of offices, factories, warehouses and necessary equipment; production technology line, operating staff. Secondly, you will spend a lot of time and effort as well as bear a major responsibility in operating, planning and making a profit for the company. This will cause you stress and pressure. Moreover, because of the great responsibility, you will push yourself to work more than anyone else. For example, you will work long hours without a break to accomplish your ultimate goal of promoting your business. On the other hand, setting out business by own self in fact having several benefits. Firstly, when you start your own business, you have the opportunity to earn a lot of income based on your own efforts and the success or failure of the business. This is different from working for a company where your income may be limited by the salary structure or performance reviews by your superiors. Secondly, owning a business allows you to be more creative in expressing yourself. You are not restricted by having to follow an established working method. Therefore, you can freely change the working process, working time frame, personnel of the company to suit and convenient. Finally, more and more people choose to start a business and contribute many social and community benefits to the country. Some start-ups can be community-driven and address environmental issues. By doing this, the country will develop more and more sustainably. For example, in the Shark Tank Vietnam program, Founder Nguyen Vo brought the GreenJoy grass straw project. With a business model that meets the needs of society, she has successfully called for 4 billion from investors. In conclusion, although some people are oriented to work in companies, being a private business owner seems to provide more satisfaction because everything is under control. Moreover, people can be creative freely and earning more money when they start their own company.
Everyone will have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
orientation in their life.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
choose to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
start
a

business by starting their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
. Others believe that it is better to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
for an

organization or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
. In my opinion, the benefits of running
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company


can outweigh the drawbacks.

On the one hand, we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
acknowledge that running one's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
can pose a

number of threats.
Firstly
, even if you have ambitions and dreams, getting a solid initial

capital to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
start
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
is
really
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
deal. In
particularly
, when
newly
established,

the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
needs a huge amount of capital to be able to go into operation.
For example
,

physical capital includes the system of offices, factories, warehouses and necessary

equipment; production technology line, operating staff.
Secondly
, you will spend a lot

of time and effort
as well
as bear a major responsibility in operating, planning and

making a profit for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
. This will cause you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
and pressure.
Moreover
,

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the great responsibility, you will push yourself to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
more than anyone

else.
For example
, you will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
long hours without a break to accomplish your ultimate

goal of promoting your business.

On the other hand
, setting out
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
self in fact having several benefits.

Firstly
, when you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
start
your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
, you have the opportunity to earn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of


income based on your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
efforts and the success or failure of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
. This is

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
from working for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
where your income may
be limited
by the salary

structure or performance reviews by your superiors.
Secondly
, owning a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows


you to be more creative in expressing yourself. You are not restricted by having to follow

an established working method.
Therefore
, you can
freely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
the working process,

working time frame, personnel of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
to suit and convenient.
Finally
, more and

more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
choose to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
start
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
and contribute
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
social and community

benefits to the country.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
-ups can be community-driven and address

environmental issues. By doing this, the country will develop more and more

sustainably
.
For example
, in the Shark Tank Vietnam program, Founder Nguyen
Possible spelling mistake found.
Vo


brought the
Possible spelling mistake found.
GreenJoy
grass straw project. With a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
model that meets the needs

of society, she has
successfully
called for 4 billion from investors.

In conclusion
, although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are oriented
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
, being a private

business owner seems to provide more satisfaction
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
everything is under control.

Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can be creative
freely
and earning more money when they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
start
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
.
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IELTS essay Others believe that it is better to work for an organization or company. In my opinion, the benefits of running people's own company can outweigh the drawbacks.

Essay
  American English
10 paragraphs
427 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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