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Organized tours to remote community are increasingly popular. It is a positive and negative development for local people and local environment.

Organized tours to remote community are increasingly popular. It is a positive and negative development for local people and local environment. nW0R
The trend of organizing tours to rural area are becoming significantly famous. It has both pros and cons for native people.  There are numerous positive benefits for the people of remote areas. The primary factor is that it enhances economic growth of the area. Tourism attracts people from all over the globe that means more employment thus flourish economic development. For example, tourist spend their money the accommodation, food services, clothing and so on. Moreover, people of local areas interact with tourists therefore it helps in development of social skills and there are chances to understand people of various regions and their perspective of life
The trend of organizing tours to rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
are becoming
significantly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
. It has both pros and cons for native
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.  There are numerous
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
benefits for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of remote
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
. The primary factor is that it enhances economic growth of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
. Tourism attracts
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from all over the globe that means more employment
thus
flourish economic development.
For example
, tourist spend their money the accommodation, food services, clothing and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
interact with tourists
therefore
it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
in development of social
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and there are chances to understand
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of various regions and their perspective of life

IELTS essay Organized tours to remote community are increasingly popular. It is a positive and negative development for local people and local environment.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
104 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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