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Opinions diverge about people these days watching TV, films and other programmes alone more than watching with a group of friends . While watching TV alone has certain advantages, I hold the view that the disadvantages are more significant.

Opinions diverge about people these days watching TV, films and other programmes alone more than watching with a group of friends. While watching TV alone has certain advantages, I hold the view that the disadvantages are more significant. m3YaN
Opinions diverge about people these days watching TV, films and other programmes alone more than watching with a group of friends. While watching TV alone has certain advantages, I hold the view that the disadvantages are more significant. There are several reasons why some people support that watching film or TV without a group can bring more benefits. The main reason is that watchers cannot be distracted. They couldn't have to put up with people who might be talking or eating while watching. Therefore, they can focus on the film and enjoy it better. However, I believe that this tendency has more possible drawbacks. First of all, the viewers lose the opportunity to discuss with other people about the ideas of the plot. They cannot share their opinions, feelings or experiences with anyone. . Moreover, for some type of movie like horror, it's better to go to the movies with friends than alone. Besides, ​​ ​​​​watching movies together, like going to the movies with friends or family, also helps people connect emotionally and get to know each other more. This is because they exchange their interests and thoughts with each other. In conclusion, while I concede that watching TV alone has many advantages, I believe that these benefits pale in comparison when compared to the drawbacks.
Opinions diverge about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
these days watching TV, films and other
Possible spelling mistake. 'programmes' is British English.
programmes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alone
more than watching with a group of friends. While watching TV
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alone
has certain advantages, I hold the view that the disadvantages are more significant.

There are several reasons why
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
support that watching film or TV without a group can bring more benefits. The main reason is that watchers cannot
be distracted
. They couldn't
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
put up with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who might be talking or eating while watching.
Therefore
, they can focus on the film and enjoy it better.

However
, I believe that this tendency has more possible drawbacks.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, the viewers lose the opportunity to discuss with other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
about the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
of the plot. They cannot share their opinions, feelings or experiences with anyone.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Moreover
, for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movie
like horror, it's better to go to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
with friends than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alone
.
Besides
, ​​

​​​​watching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
together, like going to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
with friends or family,
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
connect
emotionally
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to know each other more. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they exchange their interests and thoughts with each other.

In conclusion
, while I concede that watching TV
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alone
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
advantages, I believe that these benefits pale
in comparison
when compared to the drawbacks.
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IELTS essay Opinions diverge about people these days watching TV, films and other programmes alone more than watching with a group of friends. While watching TV alone has certain advantages, I hold the view that the disadvantages are more significant.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
216 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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