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Opinion essay on curfew in US

Opinion essay on curfew in US 7PeWY
People have different views about curfew in different regions of US, during the curfew the youngester are not allowed to go out without the elder's assistance. I personally believes that children younger than 15 years should not be allowed to go out at night. First of all curfew may not imposed those areas are free from crimes or safe for young people to go outside any time. Secondly if teenager will go out during night in those areas which are prone for crimes many chances children will get involved in crimes due to they are more curious to know about everything, they will be easily involved with their friends, moreover high rate of crimes means lack of knowledge and education, therefore children get involved in crimes such as rappes, drugs, robberies instead of studying. Consequently children will not get good reputation and beacuse of lack of jobs they wl commit crimes. so bad sequance will be repeated. However there may be a opinion that curfew should not be imposed because it is not good idea to control children's action. I agree to this in some extent, if a teenager is less than 15 years should not be allowed to be outside the home after nine'o'clock. if older than 15 years can understand what is right or what is wrong. In conculsion, in dangours areas teenager might be restricted to go out at night. however older can be exempted. What is more inportant thing is to educate the people including parents. Otherwise situation will not change.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
views about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
curfew
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
regions of US, during the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
curfew
the
Possible spelling mistake found.
youngester
are not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to go out without the elder's assistance. I
personally
Possible agreement error -- use base form here: "believe".
believes
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
younger than 15 years should not be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to go out at night.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
curfew
may not
The verb 'may' requires the base form of the verb: "impose"
imposed
those areas are free from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
or safe for young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to go outside any time.
Secondly
if
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenager
will go out during night in those areas which are prone for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
chances
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
involved in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
due to they are more curious to know about everything, they will be
easily
involved with their friends,
moreover
high rate of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
means lack of knowledge and education,
therefore
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
involved in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
such as
Possible spelling mistake found.
rappes
, drugs, robberies
instead
of studying.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Consequently
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
will not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
reputation and
Possible spelling mistake found.
beacuse
of lack of jobs
Do not use a noun immediately after the pronoun 'they'. Use a verb or an adverb, or possibly some other part of speech.
they wl
commit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
so
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
Possible spelling mistake found.
sequance
will
be repeated
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
there may be
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
opinion that
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curfew
should not
be imposed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
to control children's action. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
to this in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extent, if a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenager
is less than 15 years should not be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to be outside the home after nine'o'clock.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
if
older than 15 years can understand what is right or what is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
. In
Possible spelling mistake found.
conculsion
, in
Possible spelling mistake found.
dangours
areas
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenager
might
be restricted
to go out at night.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
however
older can
be exempted
.
What is more
Possible spelling mistake found.
inportant
thing is to educate the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
including parents.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Otherwise
situation will not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
.
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IELTS essay Opinion essay on curfew in US

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
255 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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