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Online shopping is destroying local business. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of online shopping related to this statement.

Online shopping is destroying local business. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of online shopping related to this statement. BJL3V
Online shopping has been overwheelmed local business since some years ago and it is still eradicating them. People nowadays look for facilities, acessibilities and good prices and they will certainly find them in online shooping rather than local business. Firstly, in online shopping we can find lots of goods. It may include clothes, shoes, etc, ranging from teenagers to adults. whereas local business is hard to find them due to lack of space. Local business do not have such huge space and, even sometimes, their location is not apt to endure such goods. Secondly, it is faster than local business. All you have to do is picking the products that you need just with one click and pay for them with your credit card. It will not be necessary to leave the house to take those products because post officers will delivery them to you. However, bying clothes through online shopping is not possible to try. There are some situations when we realize that what we have been bying does not suit on us. Then the online company has to retrieve us others clothes sizes. Finally, online shopping is the worldwide way used for people to find what they want.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
has been
Possible spelling mistake found.
overwheelmed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
since
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
years ago and it is
still
eradicating them.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
nowadays look for facilities,
Possible spelling mistake found.
acessibilities
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
prices and
they will
certainly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
find
them in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
Possible spelling mistake found.
shooping
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
business.

Firstly
, in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
we can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
find
lots of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
. It may include clothes, shoes, etc, ranging from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
to adults.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
whereas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
find
them due to lack of space.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
do not have such huge space and, even
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
, their location is not apt to endure such
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
.

Secondly
, it is faster than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
. All you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
do is picking the products that you need
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
with one click and pay for them with your credit card. It will not be necessary to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
to take those products
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
post officers will delivery them to you.

However
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
bying
clothes through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
is not possible to try. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
situations when we realize that what we have been
Possible spelling mistake found.
bying
does not suit on us. Then the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
retrieve us others clothes sizes.

Finally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
is the worldwide way
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
find
what they want.
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IELTS essay Online shopping is destroying local business. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of online shopping related to this statement.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
200 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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