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People today spend too much money on clothing to improve their appearance Agree or disagree

People today spend too much money on clothing to improve their appearance Agree or disagree g5qVl
Some people state that spending money on clothing is totally a waste of time and money because they believe that there are other ways to spend money much better than on clothing. However, others think otherwise. The latter agrees that it is crucial to spend money on clothing because they enjoy their appearance. In my opinion, there are other ways of spending money rather than on clothing. I feel this way as I will talk over in this article. First of all, one of the important ways to spend money is on travels. Each following year we can see many people scrimping in order to go for travels on vacation. For example, they spend time saving precious amount of money so that, when on vacation, they are able to make some small trips around their states passing by different vilages, or even going abroad visiting different countries with their different cultures. Therefore, this example elucidates the desideratum of spending on travels and showing that it is a waste of time and money spending it on outfits. Moreover, another important way of spending money wisely would be on entertainement. Because we spend too much time working hard every following year, it is primal to catch our savings and spend them going to the theater, to a concert amusements parks, etc. For instance, we nowadays are living in a very stressful world where we have too much hard work to do and this every now and again turns into depression our lives. What it is more, many persons are extremely busy at work to receive merely the amount for survival not even having money for food. Thus, this instance explains the necessity of devoiding an amount of money for entertainment because we should be aware of it and try to assuage the stress caused by work. Finally, I strongly agree that spending money on travels and entertainement are the best option for anybody who craves for a good life because both travel and entertainement help us to fend off the stressful life.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
state that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on clothing is
totally
a waste of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they believe that there are other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
much better than on clothing.
However
, others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
otherwise
. The latter
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agrees
that it is crucial to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on clothing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they enjoy their appearance. In my opinion, there are other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
rather
than on clothing. I feel this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
way
as I will talk over in this article.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, one of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
is on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travels
. Each following year we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
scrimping in order to go for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travels
on vacation.
For example
, they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
saving precious amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that, when on vacation, they are able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
trips around their states passing by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
Possible spelling mistake found.
vilages
, or even going abroad visiting
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
countries with their
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
cultures.
Therefore
, this example elucidates the desideratum of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spending
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travels
and showing that it is a waste of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spending
it on outfits.

Moreover
, another
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
way
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
wisely
would be on
Possible spelling mistake found.
entertainement
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
too much
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
working
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
every following year, it is primal to catch our savings and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
them going to the theater, to a concert amusements parks, etc.
For instance
, we nowadays are living in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
stressful world where we have too much
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
work to do and this every
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
and again turns into depression our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. What it is more,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
persons are
extremely
busy at work to receive
merely
the amount for survival not even having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
for food.
Thus
, this instance
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explains
the necessity of
Possible spelling mistake found.
devoiding
an amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
for entertainment
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
we should be aware of it and try to assuage the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
caused by work.

Finally
, I
strongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travels
and
Possible spelling mistake found.
entertainement
are the best option for anybody who craves for a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
and
Possible spelling mistake found.
entertainement
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us to fend off the stressful life.
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IELTS essay People today spend too much money on clothing to improve their appearance Agree or disagree

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
340 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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