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One of the Consequences of Improved Medical Care is That People are Living Longer and Life Expectancy is Increasing

One of the Consequences of Improved Medical Care is That People are Living Longer and Life Expectancy is Increasing N3ADj

Nowadays, there are many modern medical developments that can help people prolong their life. Many scientists or medical fields undergo thorough research and study to produce advancements that can help people who have problems with their health and to have a chance in extending their lives. Most employees retire when they are 60 years old. At that age, their body will be weaken and most likely to have their maintenance medicine because they don’t have work and mostly stay at home. To prevent this, after their retirement, they apply for a part-time job or put-up their own business to lessen their boredom. Thus they will be more active and be able to contribute to the society in spite of their old age. Life expectancy is advantage to people because based on my observation, a person who has a heart problem can extend their life by means of heart transplant and someone who has a cancer and kidney failure can prolong their life through chemotherapy and dialysis. With this, more people can helped to live a normal life and have hope that their life is still valuable. This will make life less stressful and more fun As a result, medical advancements are advantageous to the society especially for the old people. They can spend more time with their family. Grandparents can be able to help their children by taking care of their grandchildren while the parents are at work. They will teach them values and traditions which would help them to understand the past.

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 modern medical developments that can You use this word too often, consider replacing it withadviceuseservicesupportcomforthand
help
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people
 prolong their You use this word too often, consider replacing it withheartgrowthsoulactivity
life
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help
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people
 who have problems with their health and to have a chance in extending their This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :resides
lives
.

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old
. At that age, their body will be Consider using the past participle "weakened"?weakened
weaken
 and most likely to have their maintenance medicine This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:due to the factin light of the fact thatowing to the fact that
because
 they don’t have work and mostly
 stay at home. To This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :preclude
prevent
 this, after their retirement, they apply for a part-time job or put-up their This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :possess
own
 business to lessen their boredom. Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?Thus,
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in spite of
 their This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:ancientagedmature
old
 age.

Life expectancy is advantage to You use this word too often, consider replacing it withcrowdfamilycommunitynationsocietypublic
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:due to the factin light of the fact thatowing to the fact that
because
 based on my observation, a person who has a heart problem can extend their You use this word too often, consider replacing it withheartgrowthsoulactivity
life
 by means of heart transplant and someone who has a cancer and kidney failure can prolong their You use this word too often, consider replacing it withheartgrowthsoulactivity
life
 through chemotherapy and dialysis. With this, more You use this word too often, consider replacing it withcrowdfamilycommunitynationsocietypublic
people
 can This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :assisted
helped
 to This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :reside
live
 a normal You use this word too often, consider replacing it withheartgrowthsoulactivity
life
 and have hope that their You use this word too often, consider replacing it withheartgrowthsoulactivity
life
 is still
 valuable. This will This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :createconstructmanufactureproduce
make
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life
 less stressful and more fun

As a result
, medical advancements are advantageous to the society especially
 for the This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:ancientagedmature
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it withcrowdfamilycommunitynationsocietypublic
people
. They can spend more time with their family. Grandparents can be able to You use this word too often, consider replacing it withadviceuseservicesupportcomforthand
help
 their children by taking care of their grandchildren while the parents are at work. They will teach them values and traditions which would You use this word too often, consider replacing it withadviceuseservicesupportcomforthand
help
 them to understand the past. 