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One of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing. Do you think the advantage of this development outweigh the disadvantages.

The consequences of the improved medical care to the people helping them to live longer and life expectancy has been increased. And the advantages gained from this will outweigh the disadvantages from improved practice. By advancement in science technology paved a new way to the medical care and which help the people to come out of thier pain which cannot be treated with old practice in medical care. The advance technology to the practice in medical field helped the doctors to find a new way of treating patients which are not able to be cured in the past. For example the cholera disese caused many deaths in the europe and asian region in 18th century. Which lead many countrie loss their economy and people to a unknown disease. Many doctors and medical reaserchers tried to find out the cure for the disease. But they were failed in finding as there were less resourses and less medical advancement to find the medicine or vaccine to it. As years passed and growing medical resources and technology, it became easy to find the cure. Due to this many people's life were saved from the cholera disease. Many tough and major surgeries which were difficult to perform in the past by the doctors became easy and accurate in the present generation because of advanced medical technology. Hearing aids, spects for the color blind have been developed to the persons with specific deficiencies. In the present, artificial legs also have been developed the patients who has lost their legs. There are many advantages with the evolving medical care and technology to the patients and there may be some disadvantages with improved medical care such as increased expensesand some minor effects to body. i conclude that the negatives can be covered with the positives coming with the present care to the patients.
The consequences of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
helping them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
longer and life expectancy has
been increased
. And the advantages gained from this will outweigh the disadvantages from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
practice. By advancement in science
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
paved a new way to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
and which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
out of
Possible spelling mistake found.
thier
pain which cannot
be treated
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
practice in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
care.

The advance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
to the practice in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
field
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
the doctors to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
find
a new way of treating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
patients
which are not able to
be cured
in the past.
For example
the cholera
Possible spelling mistake found.
disese
caused
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
deaths in the
Possible spelling mistake found.
europe
and
Possible spelling mistake found.
asian
region in 18th century. Which lead
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
Possible spelling mistake found.
countrie
loss their economy and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to
Use “an” instead of ‘a’ if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. ‘an article’, ‘an hour’.
a
unknown disease.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
doctors and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
Possible spelling mistake found.
reaserchers
tried to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
find
out the cure for the disease.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
they
were failed
in finding as there were less
Possible spelling mistake found.
resourses
and less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
advancement to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
find
the medicine or vaccine to it. As years passed and growing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
resources and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
, it became easy to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
find
the cure. Due to this
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's life
were saved
from the cholera disease.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
tough and major surgeries which were difficult to perform in the past by the doctors became easy and accurate in the present generation
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of advanced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
. Hearing aids,
Possible spelling mistake found.
spects
for the
This word is normally spelled with a hyphen.
color blind
have
been developed
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph.
to


This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter.
the
persons with specific deficiencies. In the present, artificial legs
also
have
been developed
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
patients
who
Did you mean “have”? Alternatively, check whether the singular of ‘patients’ should be used.
has
lost their legs.

There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
advantages with the evolving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
patients
and there may be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
disadvantages with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
such as increased
Possible spelling mistake found.
expensesand
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
minor effects to body.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter.
i
conclude that the negatives can
be covered
with the positives coming with the present
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
patients
.
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IELTS essay One of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing. Do you think the advantage of this development outweigh the disadvantages.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
306 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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