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One of the biggest problems from the after effect of covid 19, is business closures. Why did businesses close? What solutions can the government offer to stop these closures?

One of the biggest problems from the after effect of covid 19, is business closures. Why did businesses close? What solutions can the government offer to stop these closures? 3bXDJ
With the unpredictable evolution of the COVID 19 pandemic, the world is now facing one of the most worrying issues – business closures. There are many factors explaining the delay in line production and lots of solutions have been imposed to reduce the significant impact on not just the economy but also the community by this discussing point. The most notable factor of the stagnancy is that many kinds of goods can not be sold to customers as they can not go out due to Covid restrictions. It is also impossible for products to be exported to other nations to reduce the contagion. As a result, the business makes no income which means the employees will not get any salary. Therefore, they gradually quit until there are no workers left and the business has to close. Take Vietnam for example, many types of goods such as rice, fruits, clothes. . . can not be exported and many people turn into poverty. Another point worth mentioning is that the longer employees work close to each other, the higher rate of infected workers will be. Therefore, some businesses are forced to close because most of their workers are infected or isolated. A specific example of this factor is developed countries, their government at first thought this virus just liked other kinds of virus which cause cold and they continue to let workers go to work. As a result, the disease spread at an uncontrolled speed which compels them to postpone detailing. One of the most effective ways to deal with this issue is that instead of producing casual clothes, they can promote manufacturing face masks and protective gear to support frontline health workers who are trying their best to contain the outbreak. As the frontline health workers, contacting COVID 19 patients is inevitable and therefore it is necessary to have high-quality protective gear. For that reason, if businesses concentrate on manufacturing those have mentioned, both issues include business closures and lack of protective gear will be solved. Another valuable candidate to tackle the problem is shopping online. With the rapid development of technology, people can shop without getting out of their homes. To be convinced, there are numerous choices for customers such as Shoppee, Lazada, Amazon, and so on. In this way, businesses can continue to produce and sell their products while not contacting directly to clients and reduce the risk of being infected. Therefore, business closures are the outcome of the COVID 19 pandemic. However, lots of solutions have been carried out by the government to alleviate the issue mentioned aboved.
With the unpredictable evolution of the
Did you mean "COVID-19" or the alternative spelling "Covid-19" (= coronavirus)?
COVID 19
pandemic, the world is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
facing one of the most worrying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
–
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
closures. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
factors explaining the delay in line production and lots of solutions have
been imposed
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the significant impact on not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
the economy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
the community by this discussing point.

The most notable factor of the stagnancy is that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
kinds of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
can not
be sold
to customers as they can not go out due to
Did you mean "COVID-19" or the alternative spelling "Covid-19" (= coronavirus)?
Covid
restrictions. It is
also
impossible for products to
be exported
to other nations to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the contagion.
As a result
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
no income which means the employees will not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
any salary.
Therefore
, they
gradually
quit until there are no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
close. Take Vietnam
for example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
types of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
such as rice, fruits, clothes.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
can
not
be exported
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
turn into poverty. Another point worth mentioning is that the longer employees work close to each other, the higher rate of infected
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
will be.
Therefore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
businesses
are forced
to close
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
most of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
are infected
or isolated. A specific example of this factor is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developed countries
, their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
at
first
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
this virus
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
liked other kinds of virus which cause
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
cold and
they continue to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
go to work.
As a result
, the disease spread at an uncontrolled speed which compels them to postpone detailing.

One of the most effective ways to deal with this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
is that
instead
of producing casual clothes, they can promote manufacturing face masks and protective gear to support
Possible spelling mistake found.
frontline
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
who are trying their best to contain the outbreak. As the
Possible spelling mistake found.
frontline
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
, contacting
Did you mean "COVID-19" or the alternative spelling "Covid-19" (= coronavirus)?
COVID 19
patients is inevitable and
therefore
it is necessary to have high-quality protective gear. For that reason, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
businesses
concentrate on manufacturing those have mentioned, both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
include
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
closures and lack of protective gear will
be solved
. Another valuable candidate to tackle the problem is shopping online. With the rapid development of technology,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can shop without getting out of their homes. To
be convinced
, there are numerous choices for customers such as
Possible spelling mistake found.
Shoppee
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Lazada
, Amazon, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on. In this way,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
businesses
can continue to produce and sell their products while not contacting
directly
to clients and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
of
being infected
.

Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
closures are the outcome of the
Did you mean "COVID-19" or the alternative spelling "Covid-19" (= coronavirus)?
COVID 19
pandemic.
However
, lots of solutions have
been carried
out by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
to alleviate the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
mentioned
Possible spelling mistake found.
aboved
.
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IELTS essay One of the biggest problems from the after effect of covid 19, is business closures. Why did businesses close? What solutions can the government offer to stop these closures?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
430 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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