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On the other hand Sydney follows different trend, with start and end of the year have high temperatures reaching almost 25 degrees. However, Sydney has cooler June, July and August compared to other two cities. This is the where Sydney temperature comes below 20 degrees. Sydney and New York people have more sunny mornings with 2453 and 2535 average annual hours respectively. In contrast, London receives less than half of them

On the other hand Sydney follows different trend, with start and end of the year have high temperatures reaching almost 25 degrees. However, Sydney has cooler June, July and August compared to other two cities. This is the where Sydney temperature comes below 20 degrees. Sydney and New York people have more sunny mornings with 2453 and 2535 average annual hours respectively. In contrast, London receives less than half of them 3AgBX
On the other hand Sydney follows different trend, with start and end of the year have high temperatures reaching almost 25 degrees. However, Sydney has cooler June, July and August compared to other two cities. This is the where Sydney temperature comes below 20 degrees. Sydney and New York people have more sunny mornings with 2453 and 2535 average annual hours respectively. In contrast, London receives less than half of them
On the other hand
Sydney follows
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
trend, with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the year have high temperatures reaching almost 25 degrees.
However
, Sydney has cooler June, July and August compared to other two cities. This is the where Sydney temperature
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
below 20 degrees.

Sydney and New York
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have more sunny mornings with 2453 and 2535 average annual hours
respectively
.
In contrast
, London receives less than half of
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
them

IELTS essay On the other hand Sydney follows different trend, with start and end of the year have high temperatures reaching almost 25 degrees. However, Sydney has cooler June, July and August compared to other two cities. This is the where Sydney temperature comes below 20 degrees. Sydney and New York people have more sunny mornings with 2453 and 2535 average annual hours respectively. In contrast, London receives less than half of them

Essay
  American English
2 paragraphs
70 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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  • On the other hand Sydney follows different trend, with start and end of the year have high temperatures reaching almost 25 degrees. However, Sydney has cooler June, July and August compared to other two cities. This is the where Sydney temperature comes below 20 degrees. Sydney and New York people have more sunny mornings with 2453 and 2535 average annual hours respectively. In contrast, London receives less than half of them