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Nowadays, young people seem to be under too much pressure to succeed from their parents. Write about 350 words to discuss the causes and effects of this phenomenon.

Nowadays, young people seem to be under too much pressure to succeed from their parents. Write about 350 words to discuss the causes and effects of this phenomenon. GWaWg
You think you may have the inexorable vigor and drive to succeed when you work in the name of your family. However, youngsters these days are pinned by a seemingly insurmountable pressure to succeed from their family. By all means, this is a complex issue, with underlying roots and long-term consequences. The causes behind this phenomenon take their origins from societal and cultural context which led parents to be stressors. First and foremost, parents may go overboard with the idea that the only way to find happiness is to succeed in life and to do that comes in “studying”. To the younger demographic, their goal in life is to enjoy youth, to have fun and to equip themselves with the tools needed to brave adulthood with all its hardships. When parents instill their expectations and beliefs into their offspring, warranted or not, the youngsters are subjected to more work, more deadlines and more self-inflicted afterthoughts. On top of that, some cultures, typically in Asia, tend to ascribe a major significance to family honor and lineage pride. And thus the issue would find itself exacerbated out of normal proportions. The effects and backlashes of pressure are negative to some extent. How would it feel to bear the weight of the world on your shoulders? One may feel intense stress as a result of all the work. A tall order as it is, success requires magnitudes of time and effort. When the pressure becomes too great, given that the mental capacity for stress may vary from person to person, it is probable that some form of psychological damage is in order. For example, youngsters may lose interest in their hobbies or become tirelessly depressed as a result of them putting themselves into the grind in view of pleasing their parents. Even if they were to succeed, would they be able to make up for the lost time, the things they probably have missed? To my view, the pressure to succeed can be used as a tool to motivate, encourage proactiveness and bring about wealth and prosperity for those who can follow through. Yet it finds itself overused and distorted in its application. Hence people end up stressed out by the future. Overall, the causes to this issue are most often antiquated social beliefs and the consequences are vast. Maybe schools and educational institutions can take part in raising awareness and guiding family on the right path.
You
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
you may have the inexorable vigor and drive to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
succeed
when you work in the name of your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
.
However
, youngsters these days
are pinned
by a
seemingly
insurmountable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
succeed
from their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
. By all means, this is a complex issue, with underlying roots and long-term consequences.

The causes behind this phenomenon take their origins from societal and cultural context which led
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
to be stressors.
First
and foremost,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
may go overboard with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
way to find happiness is to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
succeed
in life and to do that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
in “studying”. To the younger demographic, their goal in life is to enjoy youth, to have fun and to equip themselves with the tools needed to brave adulthood with all its hardships. When
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
instill their expectations and beliefs into their offspring, warranted or not, the youngsters
are subjected
to more work, more deadlines and more self-inflicted afterthoughts.
On top of that
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
cultures,
typically
in Asia, tend to ascribe a major significance to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
honor and lineage pride. And
thus
the issue would find itself exacerbated out of normal proportions.

The effects and backlashes of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extent. How would it feel to bear the weight of the world on your shoulders? One may feel intense
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
as a result
of all the work. A tall order as it is, success requires magnitudes of time and effort. When the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
becomes too great,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
that the mental capacity for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
may vary from person to person, it is probable that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
form of psychological damage is in order.
For example
, youngsters may lose interest in their hobbies or become
tirelessly
depressed
as a result
of them putting themselves into the grind in view of pleasing their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
. Even if they were to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
succeed
, would they be able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
up for the lost time, the things they
probably
have missed?

To my view, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
succeed
can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
as a tool to motivate, encourage
Possible spelling mistake found.
proactiveness
and bring about wealth and prosperity for those who can follow through.
Yet
it finds itself overused and distorted in its application.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Hence
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
up
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stressed
out by the future.

Overall
, the causes to this issue are most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
antiquated social beliefs and the consequences are vast. Maybe schools and educational institutions can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
take part
in raising awareness and guiding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
on the right path.
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IELTS essay Nowadays, young people seem to be under too much pressure to succeed from their parents. Write about 350 words to discuss the causes and effects of this phenomenon.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
404 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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