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Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changedbecause of technology. In what ways has technology affected the types ofrelationships that people make? Has this been a positive or negativedevelopment? v.2

Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changedbecause of technology. In what ways has technology affected the types ofrelationships that people make? Has this been a positive or negativedevelopment? v. 2
In the world nowadays, the behavior of people with their partners has altered since the light of the proliferation of technology. there are a variety of ways that personal relationships have been influenced by the use of technical devices and I believe that the benefits of this change outweigh the drawbacks. The two main effects on friendships which can be obviously seen are not only how people show their emotions but also the ways that they contact each other. Firstly, by reading the statuses written on social networks, teenagers can update the situation of their friends every day. Lots of people are choosing to talk to their partners by the assistance of video calls in lieu of going to restaurants or café to save time and money. Secondly, should a person install some social networks such as Facebook, Instagram, Twitter and apps like that, he can illustrate his feeling which may be unreal on the statuses and pictures of his friends. this is the reason why close relationships have declined, by contrast, losing touch with distant friends is not necessarily an unfavorable issue. The adjustment of the way that people interact is beneficial based on two key reasons. First, the use of handheld devices increasing significantly in recent years assists the users in getting in touch more easily and faster with their companions than in approximately three decades ago. For example, while it took about at least one week to deliver the letters of a temper in the past, current residents can receive immediately the vital messages in a few seconds. Furthermore, the social relations of every individual are expanding day by day. residents nowadays establish easily a relationship with a foreigner who is living in another country. In conclusion, there are some changes in relationships towards eschewing traditional communication methods like letters in favor of modern gadgets and I am firm in my belief that this improvement is convenient for people in some aspects.
In the world nowadays, the behavior of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with their partners has altered since the light of the proliferation of technology.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
there
are a variety of ways that personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relationships
have
been influenced
by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of technical devices and I believe that the benefits of this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
outweigh the drawbacks. The two main effects on friendships which can be
obviously
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
are not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
their emotions
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
the ways that they contact each other.
Firstly
, by reading the statuses written on social networks,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
can update the situation of their friends every day. Lots of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are choosing to talk to their partners by the assistance of video calls in lieu of going to restaurants or café to save time and money.
Secondly
, should a person install
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
social networks such as Facebook, Instagram, Twitter and apps like that, he can illustrate his feeling which may be unreal on the statuses and pictures of his friends.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
this
is the reason why close
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relationships
have declined, by contrast, losing touch with distant friends is not
necessarily
an unfavorable issue. The adjustment of the way that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
interact is beneficial based on two key reasons.
First
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of handheld devices increasing
significantly
in recent years assists the users in getting in touch more
easily
and faster with their companions than in approximately three decades ago.
For example
, while it took about at least one week to deliver the letters of a temper in the past,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
residents can receive immediately the vital messages in a few seconds.
Furthermore
, the social relations of every individual are expanding day by day.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
residents
nowadays establish
easily
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relationship
with a foreigner who is living in another country.
In conclusion
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relationships
towards eschewing traditional communication methods like letters in favor of modern
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
gadgets and
I am firm in my belief that this improvement is convenient for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
aspects.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
9Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes
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Chinese Proverb

IELTS essay Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changedbecause of technology. In what ways has technology affected the types ofrelationships that people make? Has this been a positive or negativedevelopment? v. 2

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
325 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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