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 Nowadays, the internet and television have given ordinary people a chance to become famous. Is this a positive or negative development?

 Nowadays, the internet and television have given ordinary people a chance to become famous. Is this a positive or negative development? mJ51
We live in a technology world. At the present time, people get a plethora of opportunities to express their talent through the internet and TV programs. From my point of view, I think that in social media and TV shows programs people try to express their activities. Firstly, we know about our modern technology. The internet does a huge change in our daily activities. We can see that at present time the young generation think about a new idea, and they express their opinion, activities share on social media. Such as, think about Facebook, Instagram and YouTube, and other media. A person can easily well-known by using these platforms. All over the world, celebrity people are more popular on the internet. Sometimes a number of people use the internet in bad ways. Basically, young people think about how can they well-known on the internet. A number of popular apps like TikTok, Likee are used for humorous video content, and in these sectors, a plethora of people achieved their popularity. A number of fan followers follow them. Secondly, TV is extremely popular, and we see TV shows popular programs. For example, a few TV channels organize events of singing, dancing programs. Consequently, that, a number of participates are participating in that events. A plethora of celebrity people are more well-known at that event. They shine in their life. People know them by TV shows events. To conclude, a person can easily represent by the internet and TV on the contrary it is a good idea.
We
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in a technology world. At the present time,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a plethora of opportunities to express their talent through the internet and TV
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
programs
. From my point of view, I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that in social media and TV
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
programs
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
try to express their activities.

Firstly
, we know about our modern technology. The internet does a huge
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in our daily activities. We can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
that at present time the young generation
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
about a new
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
, and they express their opinion, activities share on social media. Such as,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
about Facebook, Instagram and YouTube, and other media. A person can
easily
well-known by using these platforms. All over the world, celebrity
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
popular
on the internet.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Sometimes
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the internet in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
ways.
Basically
, young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
about how can they well-known on the internet. A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
popular
apps like TikTok,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Likee
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for humorous video content, and in these sectors, a plethora of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
achieved their popularity. A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of fan followers follow them.

Secondly
, TV is
extremely
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
popular
, and we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
TV
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
popular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
programs
.
For example
, a few TV channels organize
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
of singing, dancing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
programs
.
Consequently
, that, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of participates are participating in that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
. A plethora of celebrity
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are more well-known at that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
event
. They shine in their life.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
know them by TV
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
.

To conclude
, a person can
easily
represent by the internet and TV
on the contrary
it is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
.
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IELTS essay  Nowadays, the internet and television have given ordinary people a chance to become famous. Is this a positive or negative development?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
254 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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