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Nowadays technology is increasingly being used to monitor what people are saying and doing (for example ,through cellphone tracking and security cameras).in many cases , the people being monitoroed are unaware that this is happening. Do you think the advantged of this development outweigh the disadvantages?.

In recent times, technology has been rapidly used in various sectors for people's satisfaction. Morever, it is also used the surveillance of people's activities but there are some people who do not know about surveillance. personally, i deem that there are more advantages of this development than drawbacks and i explain my reasons in following paragraphs. on the one hand, it is true that usage of technological tools has increased in various ways. Hence, it can be easy to prevent theft in shops, houses and big industries by video cameras. Morever, it has decreased crime rate ratio in society such as police can easily nabbed and tracking a thief by imei number through cell phones. Furthermore, this cameras helps to more attension on workers to check their individual duties in big industries and increase productivity. on the other hand, it also some disadvantages that this is against human rights and freedom where people have their own privacy. Besides that, this data could be misused by the member of authorities, as the data used for business and blackmailing. In conclusion, it is common that usage of advanced technology devices to monitor their residents activities and it has some demerits which is releted as human's privacy policy so more advatages than disadvantages.
In recent times, technology has been
rapidly
used
in various sectors for
people
's satisfaction.
Morever
, it is
also
used
the surveillance of
people
's activities
but
there are
some
people
who do not know about surveillance.
personally
,
i
deem that there are more advantages of this development than drawbacks and
i
explain
my reasons in following paragraphs.
on
the one hand, it is true that usage of technological tools has increased in various ways.
Hence
, it can be easy to
prevent
theft in shops,
houses
and
big
industries by video cameras.
Morever
, it has decreased crime rate ratio in society such as police can
easily
nabbed and tracking a thief by
imei
number through cell phones.
Furthermore
,
this
cameras
helps
to more
attension
on workers to
check
their individual duties in
big
industries and increase productivity.

on
the other hand, it
also
some
disadvantages that this is against human rights and freedom where
people
have their
own
privacy.
Besides
that, this data could
be misused
by the member of authorities, as the data
used
for business and blackmailing.

In conclusion
, it is common that usage of advanced technology devices to monitor their residents
activities and
it has
some
demerits which is
releted
as human's privacy policy
so
more
advatages
than disadvantages.
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IELTS essay Nowadays technology is increasingly being used to monitor what people are saying and doing (for example, through cellphone tracking and security cameras). in many cases, the people being monitoroed are unaware that this is happening. Do you think the advantged of this development outweigh the disadvantages? .

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
210 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
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Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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