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Nowadays technology have change some people believe that one-to-one classes are better and some people believe that group studies are better my parable discuss both views

Nowadays technology have change some people believe that one-to-one classes are better and some people believe that group studies are better my parable discuss both views 0AaB5
These days study pressure is too high for pupils so they all want to study online because student can save their time and energy there are lots of measures for instance scstudent can study according to their times moreover they do not need to travel and they can save time it will help them to study hard further more people can study anywhere any time only they need is mobile or laptop with Internet additionally they are more good able to do study at home However some citizens believe that 121 classes are better than online classes I also believe the same because there are lots of reasons for example if students are not understanding they can ask state away from their school partner moreover a group study helps pupil always because sometime it hard to understand but friends can help face-to-face for the more it is very easy to understand face-to-face rather than online studies addition they are more capable to manage timing if they are going to school because school do not teach only subject much more To the end I believe that group studies are more good for students because student get to know more knowledgeable things which use in future
These days
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
pressure is too high for pupils
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they all want to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
online
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
can save their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and energy there are lots of measures
for instance
Possible spelling mistake found.
scstudent
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
according to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
moreover
they do not need to
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
travel and
they can save
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
further
more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
anywhere any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
they need is mobile or laptop with Internet
additionally
they are more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
able to do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
at home

Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
citizens believe that 121 classes are better than online classes I
also
believe the same
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
there are lots of reasons
for example
if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
The verb 'understanding' is a stative verb and sometimes the progressive form is not correct. Try a simple form instead.
are not understanding
they can ask state away from their school partner
moreover
a group
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
pupil always
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
sometime it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to understand
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
friends can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
face-to-face for the more it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
easy to understand face-to-face
rather
than online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
addition they are more capable to manage timing if they are going to school
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
school do not teach
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
subject much more

To the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
I believe that group
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
are more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to know more knowledgeable things which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
in future

IELTS essay Nowadays technology have change some people believe that one-to-one classes are better and some people believe that group studies are better my parable discuss both views

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
203 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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