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Nowadays,sugar plays a crucial role in human diet. A huge amount of sugar is used in processed foods and drink products which can result in health problems. Agree or disagree

Nowadays, sugar plays a crucial role in human diet. A huge amount of sugar is used in processed foods and drink products which can result in health problems. Agree or disagree paplD
Nowadays, sugar plays a crucial role in human diet. A huge amount of sugar is used in processed foods and drink products which can result in health problems. One way to create motivation in people to consume less sugar is increasing the cost of some sugary products. I partially agree with this statement, I think increasing the price can encourage more people to consume less foods and drinks which are contained a high amount of sugar but other solutions should be taken into account. from my point of view, low price of sugar products is a main reason why people use these products. Consuming sugary products can result in obesity and various diseases like diabetes and kidney problems. By increasing the price of foods and drinks which have a huge amount of sugar people would be demotivated to spend money on purchasing these products. However, there are some people would use sugary products despite the high price that they should pay. generally it could be a positive trend. There are two ways to prevent people to consume less sugary products. Firstly, reducing the cost of vegetables and fruits. From sienticnts points of view, vegans diet can have positive influence on health because they are full of vitamins, which are vital for our body. Therefore, if these kinds of food be more cheep, people will be more motivated to use them. As a result, they would be more healthy. Another solution is providing more sport facilities by governments. According to scientific research, doing 30 minute exercise per day can result in reducing health problems like heart attacks. Due to lack of sport facilities or high price of gyms some individuals are less likely to do sports and then they haven't enough physical activity. This could result in overweight and various diseases. Consequently if governments take steps in providing more facilities in public spaces like parks more people will be encourage to do sports. In conclusion, Although, increasing costs of sugary products can be influential it would be better if other measures like paying attention to physical activity and healthy diet taken into account.
Nowadays,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugar
plays a crucial role in human diet. A huge amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugar
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in processed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
and drink
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
which can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
result
in health problems. One way to create motivation in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to consume
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugar
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increasing
the cost of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
. I
partially
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this statement, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increasing
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
can encourage more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to consume
Did you mean "fewer"? The noun foods is countable.
less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
and drinks which
are contained
a high amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugar
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
other solutions should
be taken
into account.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
from
my point of view, low
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
is a main reason why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
. Consuming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
result
in obesity and various diseases like diabetes and kidney problems. By
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increasing
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
and drinks which have a huge amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
would
be demotivated
to spend money on purchasing these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
.
However
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
despite the high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
that they should pay.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
generally
it could be a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
trend. There are two ways to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to consume
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
.
Firstly
, reducing the cost of vegetables and fruits. From
Possible spelling mistake found.
sienticnts
points of view, vegans diet can have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
influence on health
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are full of vitamins, which are vital for our body.
Therefore
, if these kinds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
be more cheep,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will be more motivated to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
them. As a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
result
, they would be more healthy. Another solution is providing more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
facilities by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
. According to scientific research, doing 30 minute exercise per day can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
result
in reducing health problems like heart attacks. Due to lack of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
facilities or high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
of gyms
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
individuals are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
likely to do
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
sports and
then they haven't
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
physical activity. This could
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
result
in overweight and various diseases.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Consequently
if
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
take steps in providing more facilities in public spaces like parks more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will be
Consider using the past participle "encouraged"?
encourage
Did you mean "doing"? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, 'encourage' + 'to' takes an object, usually a pronoun.
to do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
.
In conclusion
, Although,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increasing
costs of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
can be influential it would be better if other measures like paying attention to physical activity and healthy diet taken into account.

IELTS essay Nowadays, sugar plays a crucial role in human diet. A huge amount of sugar is used in processed foods and drink products which can result in health problems. Agree or disagree

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
352 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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