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Nowadays people are spending more time at their workplace and staying away from their home for work . What are advantage and disadvantage of trend.

Nowadays people are spending more time at their workplace and staying away from their home for work. What are advantage and disadvantage of trend. M6Gk
In the contemporary world, employment plays significant role in every individuals life. It has been observed that, people more prefer to stay at their job place in place house. The upcoming paragraphs highlight the brighter and the darker side of this trend. There is no denying that, there is lots of benefits of this. First and foremost, when the individuals live nearworkplace then they become more responsible and independent person. As they are dealed with all the problem by themselves. And such situations become the individuals more strong and responsible. Furthermore, they enjoy their freedom. Because they live spreat from their family and by themselves individuals make their own decisions. To Set an example, when People live family members then members of the family have full control on their life and sometime some person do not openly express themselves. On the other side, there are also some drawbacks of this trend. Primarily, person who living alone suffer from many health problems. As there is no one by whom they share their problems. Due to this, they boost their stress and suffer from innumerable issues related to their physical and mental strength. For instance, in the lockdown period, famous Bollywood personality, Sushant Singh rajput live far away from their family and due to loneliness he was destroyed their life by himself. To conclude, work is very important for every individuals. However, it is also very necessary to individuals spend their quality time with family members. Because in this way, they stay far away from problems.
In the contemporary world, employment plays significant role in every
Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean "individuals'" or "individual's"?
individuals
life. It has
been observed
that,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
more prefer to stay at their job place in place
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
. The upcoming paragraphs highlight the brighter and the darker side of this trend. There is no denying that, there is lots of benefits of this.
First
and foremost, when the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
Possible spelling mistake found.
nearworkplace
then they become more responsible and independent person.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
they are
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "dealt", the past tense form of the verb 'deal'?
dealed
with all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
by themselves. And such situations become the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
more strong and responsible.
Furthermore
, they enjoy their freedom.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
Possible spelling mistake found.
spreat
from their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
and by themselves
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
decisions. To Set an example,
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
when


This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
members then members of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
have full control on their life and sometime
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Did you mean "people", "persons"?
person
do not
openly
express themselves. On the other side, there are
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
drawbacks of this trend.
Primarily
, person who living alone suffer from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
there is no one by whom they share their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
. Due to this, they boost their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
and suffer from innumerable issues related to their physical and mental strength.
For instance
, in the lockdown period,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
Bollywood personality,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Sushant
Singh
Possible spelling mistake found.
rajput
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
far away from their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
and due to loneliness he was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroyed
their life by himself.
To conclude
, work is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for every
The noun should be probably in the singular form: "individual"?
individuals
.
However
, it is
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
necessary to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
spend their quality time with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
members.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
in this way, they stay far away from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
.
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IELTS essay Nowadays people are spending more time at their workplace and staying away from their home for work. What are advantage and disadvantage of trend.

Essay
  American English
2 paragraphs
254 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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