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Nowadays, parents give more freedom to their children than in the past. Is it a positive or negative development? Give your opinion and include relevant v.1

Nowadays, parents give more freedom to their children than in the past. Is it a positive or negative development? Give your opinion and include relevant v. 1
In recent times, children are allowed more freedom than was obtainable in the past. In my view, I believe this is a positive development as this helps develop their independence and self-confidence. To begin, granting young people more liberty helps them become self-dependent. These people are able to think critically and come up with solutions without needing the assistance of anyone, thus making them independent. For instance, in a small village in Nigeria, teenage boys are free to do whatsoever they wish, and as such, these children are now totally self dependent. Furthermore, more freedom given to children will make them self-confident. Because childhood is generally seen as a period of reliance on parents, if young people are then allowed more liberty, they will learn to trust and believe in themselves, thereby increasing their self-esteem, and consequently their level of confidence in themselves. To illustrate, a recent research in 2017 by the faculty of sociology of University of London reveals that to make children have trust in themselves, more privilege ought to be given to them. In conclusion, contrary to what was seen in the time of old, parents currently give more freedom to their young ones. I consider this a good thing because of the increased level of Independence and self-confidence in children associated with this trend.
In recent times,
children
are
allowed
more freedom than was obtainable in the past. In my view, I believe this is a
positive
development as this
helps
develop their independence and self-confidence.

To
begin
, granting young
people
more liberty
helps
them become self-dependent. These
people
are able to
think
critically
and
come
up with solutions without needing the assistance of anyone,
thus
making them independent.
For instance
, in a
small
village in Nigeria, teenage boys are free to do whatsoever they wish, and as such, these
children
are
now
totally
self dependent.

Furthermore
, more freedom
given
to
children
will
make
them self-confident.
Because
childhood is
generally
seen
as a period of reliance on parents, if young
people
are then
allowed
more liberty, they will learn to trust and believe in themselves, thereby increasing their self-esteem, and
consequently
their level of confidence in themselves. To illustrate, a recent research in 2017 by the faculty of sociology of University of London reveals that to
make
children
have trust in themselves, more privilege ought to be
given
to them.

In conclusion
, contrary to what was
seen
in the time of
old
, parents
currently
give more freedom to their young ones. I consider this a
good
thing
because
of the increased level of Independence and self-confidence in
children
associated with this trend.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes

IELTS essay Nowadays, parents give more freedom to their children than in the past. Is it a positive or negative development? Give your opinion and include relevant v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
218 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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