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Nowadays, older people who need employment have to complete with younger people. What problems does this cause, and what are the solution?

Recently, jobs are more competition Between aging and youth people. They are face many problem such as older people do not handle new technology, teenagers lack of experience and lower levels communication skills, whereas solutions are keeping training season, combination team work and to manage conference of meeting by youngest people. Firstly, older people do not able or maintain new technology in company project. Whenever a company take a lot of use for company work, it will lose in the future because oldest people do not capable new machines. It has many solution for this cause, but one of the best option is to have practical section before they operate a technology. So, they easily work with them properly. Secondly, youth people have enormous in a company. They do not much experience than the older people. As a result, they can not completely Their work. It has one of best solution which is combination team work. This work helps by oldest people to the juvenile people. For example i was work a computer section in the media of Bangladesh company whereas senior manager and up coming people do mix work that was really help for younger people and myself. Finally, younger has lack of communication skills. This skills are very importance for the business activities. A employee must know how to cope with a customer. It can be progress business in competition markets. however, only conversation skill is not develop a business. It has also gesture and smatter people who is easily to manage clients and attack to the customers. It has solution that is meeting conference to take the young people which bulid up their conversation skill. In conclusion, aging and juvenile people are both important in the company work. They can increase a company profits and to help the gain reach level of business in the world.
Recently, jobs are more competition Between aging and youth
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. They are face
Possible agreement error. The noun problem seems to be countable; consider using: “many problems”.
many problem
such as older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not handle new technology,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
lack of experience and lower levels communication
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
, whereas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solutions
are keeping training season, combination team
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and to manage conference of meeting by youngest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
Firstly
, older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not able or maintain new technology in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
project. Whenever a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
take
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
, it will lose in the future
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
oldest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not capable new machines. It has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solution
for this cause,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
one of the best option is to have practical section
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
they operate a technology.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, they
easily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
with them
properly
.
Secondly
, youth
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have enormous in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
. They do not much experience than the older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
As a result
, they can not completely Their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
. It has one
A determiner is probably missing here: “of the best”.
of best
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solution
which is combination team
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
by oldest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to the juvenile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
For example
Is this the personal pronoun “I”? It is spelled uppercase.
i
was
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
a computer section in the media of Bangladesh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
whereas senior manager and
This word is normally spelled as one. Did you mean “upcoming”?
up coming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do mix
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
that was
really
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
for younger
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and
Please check whether you should use the object pronoun “me”.
myself
.
Finally
, younger has lack of communication
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
.
‘This’ does not seem to match the plural noun ‘skills’. Did you mean “these”?
This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
importance for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
activities.
Use “An” instead of ‘A’ if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. ‘an article’, ‘an hour’.
A
employee
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
know how to cope with a customer. It can be progress
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
in competition markets.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter.
however
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
conversation
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skill
is not develop a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
. It has
also
Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: “gestured”.
gesture
and
Possible spelling mistake found.
smatter
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
Did you mean “are”? Alternatively, check whether the singular of ‘people’ should be used.
is
easily
to manage clients and attack to the customers. It has
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solution
that is
meeting conference to take the young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
which
Possible spelling mistake found.
bulid
up their conversation
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skill
.
In conclusion
, aging and juvenile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are both
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
. They can increase a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
profits and to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
the gain reach level of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
in the world.
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IELTS essay Nowadays, older people who need employment have to complete with younger people. What problems does this cause, and what are the solution?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
309 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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