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Nowadays, more people are choosing to socialize online rather than face to face. Is this a positive or negative development? Write at least 250 words.

People are adhered to their cellphones and tablets. They are constantly updating their status on social networks and checking out the photos and videos uploaded by their friends. As a matter of fact, most of us now have more friends online than in the actuality. In my opinion, this is a negative development that can have undesirable effects. Unrestrained online socialization can initiate to depression, isolation and discernible. The internet is a great platform to share views and opinions, but it also generates unhealthy competition among people. Recent studies have shown that people develop self-abasement when their friends get more comments or likes than them. Social media has many opposing effects. There is no guarantee that the people we meet online are actually real. Numerous of them create fake profiles with an aim of double-crossing sincere individuals. There have been various incidence of adolescents committing suicide after they got cheated by their friends on digital platforms. Most of the people who are obsessed to online socialization have hardly any time for talking to their family members or neighbors. This can affect family relationships. Also, it can cause the individual to become isolated from his society. Face to face communications, in contrast, leads to the development of reliable relationships that lasts longer. Meeting a friend or a dear one over home or in a park is always a memorable experience. Social media friendships lack that affection. Also, we cannot expect from our virtual friends living in another part of the universe to assist us when we are in distress. In conclusion, it is not complicated to observe that excess of online socialization is bad. It affects our relationships. It is obvious that the internet has become a part of our lives in many different ways, but if we are addicted to it, we will develop many issues. After all, the virtual platform cannot replace the real platform and neither virtual friends can replace the real friends
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
are adhered
to their cellphones and tablets. They are
constantly
updating their status on social networks and checking out the photos and videos uploaded by their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
. As a matter of fact, most of us
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
have more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
than in the actuality. In my opinion, this is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
development that can have undesirable effects.

Unrestrained
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
socialization can initiate to depression, isolation and discernible. The internet is a great
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
platform
to share views and opinions,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it
also
generates unhealthy competition among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Recent studies have shown that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
develop self-abasement when their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more comments or likes than them.

Social media has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
opposing effects. There is no guarantee that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
are actually real. Numerous of them create fake profiles with an aim of double-crossing sincere individuals. There have been various incidence of adolescents committing suicide after they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
cheated by their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
on digital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
platforms
. Most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
are obsessed
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
socialization have hardly any time for talking to their family members or neighbors. This can affect family relationships.
Also
, it can cause the individual to become isolated from his society.

Face to face communications,
in contrast
, leads to the development of reliable relationships that lasts longer. Meeting a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
or a dear one over home or in a park is always a memorable experience. Social media friendships lack that affection.
Also
, we cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expect
from our virtual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
living in another part of the universe to assist us when we are in distress.

In conclusion
, it is not complicated to observe that excess of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
socialization is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
. It affects our relationships. It is obvious that the internet has become a part of our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
ways,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
if we
are addicted
to it, we will develop
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
issues.
After all
, the virtual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
platform
cannot replace the real
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
platform
and neither virtual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
can replace the real
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
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IELTS essay Nowadays, more people are choosing to socialize online rather than face to face. Is this a positive or negative development?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
324 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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