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Nowadays, more and more children have an unhealthy diet. What can the government do to encourage children to eat healthier diet?

Nowadays, more and more children have an unhealthy diet. What can the government do to encourage children to eat healthier diet? waPwq
Children’s health have a big influence on their development in the future, but these day, children have an unhealthy diet increasingly popular and there is a detriment in their health because of bad eating habit. So, government should give some solution to tackle this issue. One of the important solution is that government should restrict opening hours as well as locations of food stores selling unhealthy food items. For example, bubble milk tea shops should be forbidden from being near schools. As a consequence, it can send a clear signal that fast food is bad for health and reduce people’ access to unhealthy food. However, this would not stop people cooking and eating unhealthy food at home or they would replace by an online order and call for delivery. The next solution is for government to bring out some rules to regulate the food industry. Specifically, governments can require food producers to fortify their products with vitamins and hygiene substances. As a result, children would eat healthier food without changing their habits. Nevertheless, this would be unpopular and expensive for food producers. Moreover, schools could educate children about healthy eating. This mean that government require schools to teach children how to cook healthy foods or schools must choose healthy eating patterns which contain less sugar and fat in order to teach students. Consequently, children would aware of food that contain nutrition, they can take pride on their learning and transfer skills to home. The drawback is that schools may not have the facilities to teach cooking. In conclusion, not only the government but also the school and their parents are responsible for children’s health as well as care about this problem more and more.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Children’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
influence on their development in the future,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
Did you mean "this day" or "these days"?
these day
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
have an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
unhealthy
diet
increasingly
popular and there is a detriment in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eating
habit.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should give
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
solution to tackle this issue.

One of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
solution is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should restrict opening hours
as well
as locations of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
stores selling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
unhealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
items.
For example
, bubble milk tea shops should
be forbidden
from being near
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
. As a consequence, it can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
signal that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
’ access to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
unhealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
.
However
, this would not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
cooking and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
unhealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
at
Use a comma before 'or' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
home or
they would replace by an online order and call for delivery.

The
next
solution is for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
to bring out
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
to regulate the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
industry.
Specifically
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
can require
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
producers to fortify their products with vitamins and hygiene substances.
As a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
would eat healthier
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
without changing their habits.
Nevertheless
, this would be unpopular and expensive for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
producers.

Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
could educate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
about healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eating
. This mean that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
require
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
to teach
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
how to cook healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
choose healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eating
patterns which contain less sugar and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fat
in order to teach students.
Consequently
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
The word 'aware' is a noun or an adjective. A verb is missing or misspelled, or maybe a comma is missing.
would aware
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
that contain nutrition, they can take pride on their learning and transfer
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
to home. The drawback is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
may not have the facilities to teach cooking.

In conclusion
, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
and their parents are responsible for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
as well
as care about this problem more and more.
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IELTS essay Nowadays, more and more children have an unhealthy diet. What can the government do to encourage children to eat healthier diet?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
284 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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