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Nowadays, many students choose to do a part-time job during their college time. What are the advantages and disadvantages of students doing a part-time job? Give reason for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

Nowadays, many students choose to do a part-time job during their college time. What are the advantages and disadvantages of students doing a part-time job? Give reason for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience. Lq0rK
Every year, going to college is always a big change for any student. In recent years, students have chosen to do a part time job while studying in university. In my opinion, doing a part time job during college has both advantages and disadvantages. First and foremost, getting a part time job can help students with financial burden. Most college’s students are living far from home and can only look for their parents to send them money so they can deal with university fees and the living cost. Instead of waiting for parents to send money every weekend, they can go to work in a coffee shop or a clothing store to earn money. Getting a part time job can help them and their family reduce their concern about money. Moreover, getting a part time job can help students acquire social skills and be more independent. For instance, when students work in Food and Beverage services, they will have a chance to learn how to communicate with customers and every skill they need to know in this area. With these skills, they can apply in daily life communication and also in their future career. Furthermore, with these social skills that they learned from doing a part time job can help them be financially independent and don’t want to spend extravagantly. Turning to the otherside, getting a part time job can affect studies in school. Students who are doing a part time job usually get tired because of long hours working at night. This will lead to students not able to concentrate on studying and might fail their test. Moreover, students who are doing a part time job while going to college often find it hard to take care of themselves. For example, students with a tight schedule of studying and working at the same time can not prepare a healthy meal for themselves. They will not be able to load every nutritious meal that their body needs. College student’s usually eat junk food or only 1 meal per day because they are too exhausted after studying and working. This can lead to physical problems and mental problems as well. In conclusion, although getting a part time job while going to university has certain benefits, such as acquiring social skills and helping families with financial burden, it also has numeros drawbacks, including physical problems and mental health problems. From my point of view, I believe that the disadvantage of doing a part time job while studying in university eventually outweighs the advantage.
Every year, going to college is always a
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big
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
for any
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student
. In recent years,
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students
have chosen to do a
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part
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time
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job
while
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studying
in
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university
. In my opinion,
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doing
a
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part
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time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
during college has both advantages and disadvantages.

First
and foremost, getting a
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part
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time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
can
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help
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students
with financial burden. Most college’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are living far from home and can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
look for their parents to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
them
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money
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they can deal with
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university
fees and the living cost.
Instead
of waiting for parents to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
every weekend, they can go to work in a coffee shop or a clothing store to earn
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money
. Getting a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
part
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
them and their family
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
their concern about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
.
Moreover
, getting a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
part
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
acquire social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
and be more independent.
For instance
, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
work in Food and Beverage services, they will have a chance to learn how to communicate with customers and every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skill
they need to know in this area. With these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
, they can apply in daily life communication and
also
in their future career.
Furthermore
, with these social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
that they learned from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doing
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
part
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
them be
financially
independent and don’t want to spend
extravagantly
.

Turning to the
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otherside
, getting a
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part
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
can affect studies in school.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Students
who are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doing
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
part
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
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job
usually
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
tired
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of long hours working at night. This will lead to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
not able to concentrate on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studying
and might fail their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
test
.
Moreover
,
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students
who are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doing
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
part
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
while going to college
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
find it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to take care of themselves.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
with a tight schedule of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studying
and working at the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
can not prepare a healthy meal for themselves. They will not be able to load every nutritious meal that their body needs. College
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student’s
usually
eat junk food or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
1 meal per day
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are too exhausted after
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studying
and working. This can lead to physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
and mental
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problems
as well
.

In conclusion
, although getting a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
part
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
while going to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
has certain benefits, such as acquiring social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
and helping families with financial burden, it
also
has
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numeros
drawbacks, including physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
and mental health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
. From my point of view, I believe that the disadvantage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doing
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
part
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studying
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
eventually
outweighs the advantage.
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IELTS essay Nowadays, many students choose to do a part-time job during their college time. What are the advantages and disadvantages of students doing a part-time job? Give reason for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
421 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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  • Nowadays, many students choose to do a part-time job during their college time. What are the advantages and disadvantages of students doing a part-time job? Give reason for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.