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Nowadays many min Rati languages are disappearing. Why ? It is positive or negative?

Nowadays many min Rati languages are disappearing. Why? It is positive or negative? m9WAq
it is irrefutable that in today's era of modern technology people influenced more towards foreign language. Wisdom dictates that these days those languages are die out which are spoken by less than 50% citizens. There are many reasons behind this and it has both merits and demerits. The main reason why this speeches are disappearing as they are attracted more to other languages like English, French or Spanish. The fact is that they find it easy and convenient as well as it help themselves in their future life. Some people can earn money by teaching to others. As it is A source of income also. Consequently, in today's fast paced life people influenced towards this which has benefits. Undoubtedly, individuals forget about the culture of their native country. As there is a direct linkage of language with tradition. If they don't remember about there customs, they definitely die out their mother tongue. It is believed by masses that youngsters cannot maintained their cultural values. But, in fact, they always follow the footsteps of their elders. Thus, if they follow their cultural values youth also do this. However, it has some fruitful results, if there are not many types of languages. As the fewer the languages, richer and more effective they would be. The country become strong in terms of economy because people can able to understand each other languages. To cite an example, in developed countries, mainly, America, Switzerland, economy is strong due to the fact they have no wide variety of languages. As a result, citizens there are more cooperative because they easily know others problems. In conclusion, by considering the aspects, I personally reiterate that individuals learn and talk only in those languages from which they get more benefits. Whereas, they might not forget about their mother tongue.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
it
is irrefutable that in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's era of modern technology
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
influenced more towards foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
. Wisdom dictates that these days those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
die
out which
are spoken
by less than 50% citizens. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
reasons behind this and it has both merits and demerits.

The main reason why
Did you mean "these"?
this
speeches are disappearing as they
are attracted
more to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
like English, French or Spanish. The fact is that they find it easy and convenient
as well
as it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
themselves in their future life.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can earn money by teaching to others.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
it is A source of income
also
.
Consequently
, in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
paced life
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
influenced towards this which has benefits.
Undoubtedly
, individuals forget about the culture of their native country.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
there is a direct linkage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
with tradition. If they don't remember about there customs, they definitely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
die
out their mother tongue. It
is believed
by masses that youngsters cannot
The verb 'cannot' requires the base form of the verb: "maintain"
maintained
their cultural values.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, in fact, they always follow the footsteps of their elders.
Thus
, if they follow their cultural values youth
also
do this.
However
, it has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
fruitful results, if there are not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
. As the fewer the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
, richer and more effective they would be. The country become strong in terms of economy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
Please check whether one of these words is redundant.
can able to
understand each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
. To cite an example, in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developed countries
,
mainly
, America, Switzerland, economy is strong due to the fact they have no wide variety of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
.
As a result
, citizens there are more cooperative
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
easily
know others problems.

In conclusion
, by considering the aspects, I
personally
reiterate that individuals learn and talk
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
in those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
from which they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more benefits.
“Whereas” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Whereas
, they might not forget about their mother tongue.
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IELTS essay Nowadays many min Rati languages are disappearing. Why? It is positive or negative?

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
300 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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