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Nowadays films and computer games contain violance are popular.Some people think those films and games should be banned . While others think they are just harmless relaxation. Discuss both the views and gives your opinion.

Nowadays films and computer games contain violance are popular. Some people think those films and games should be banned. While others think they are just harmless relaxation. r1pjp
We are living in modern era, where technology has spread its legs in every corner in the world. With the advancement of technology, computer games changed behaviour of juvenile's. Many people believe that video games put bad influence on the children. While other think it's only for fun and entertainment. On one hand, according to several human being, computer games and movies are pornography as well as violent sceneries which impact on society especially children. For example, films and games contain violent have affected the physiology and physiology of person. As a result, children behaviour becomes more aggressive. In addition, due to this crime rate is increase in city. A segment of individuals believes that the video games and cinema are detrimental to modern society. For instance, movies and video games work as a stress buster and feel more untrouble. Eventually, this can cause children are not concentrate on their study. On other hand, in my opinion, computer games and documentaries have made only entertain people. For example, such things give them some relaxation and peace. As a result, people can stay stress free. After a hactic schedule of the day, it work as a stress reliever source. Nevertheless, parents should take care of their children to the donot watch much violence on games and films. In conclusion, every coin has two sides such as pros and cons. So we should be built a limitation to saw violance in movie or games.
We are living in modern era, where technology has spread its legs in every corner in the world. With the advancement of technology, computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
of juvenile's.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that video
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
put
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
influence on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. While other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
it's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
for fun and entertainment.

On one hand, according to several human being, computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
and movies are pornography
as well
as violent sceneries which impact on society
especially
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
For example
, films and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
contain violent have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
the physiology and physiology of person.
As a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
becomes more aggressive.
In addition
, due to this crime rate is increase in city. A segment of individuals believes that the video
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
and cinema are detrimental to modern society.
For instance
, movies and video
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
work as a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
buster and feel more
Possible spelling mistake found.
untrouble
.
Eventually
, this can cause
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are not concentrate on their study.

On other hand, in my opinion, computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
and documentaries have made
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
entertain
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.
For example
, such things give them
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
relaxation and peace.
As a result
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can stay
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
free. After a
Possible spelling mistake found.
hactic
schedule of the day, it
Did you mean "works"?
work
as a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
reliever source.
Nevertheless
, parents should take care of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to the
Possible spelling mistake found.
donot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
much violence on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
and films.

In conclusion
, every coin has two sides such as pros and cons.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
we should
be built
a limitation to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
Possible spelling mistake found.
violance
in movie or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
.
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IELTS essay Nowadays films and computer games contain violance are popular. Some people think those films and games should be banned. While others think they are just harmless relaxation.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
242 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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