Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Nowadays, due to the reduction of physical activities among children, many people believe that some mandatory sports courses are appropriate for children in order to make up this neglected part of their lives.

Nowadays, due to the reduction of physical activities among children, many people believe that some mandatory sports courses are appropriate for children in order to make up this neglected part of their lives. QLRyP
Nowadays, due to the reduction of physical activities among children, many people believe that some mandatory sports courses are appropriate for children in order to make up this neglected part of their lives. Although I agree to some extent, in my view these activities must be chosen based on physical and mental abilities and interest factor for each student. Numerous people think the new generation have always disagreed with involuntary activities and children mostly do an activity based on their interests. Nowadays, convincing a child immersed in the virtual world and online games to participate in sports courses is profoundly difficult. Moreover, people have different physical and mental abilities. For example, playing basketball is not an appropriate sport for short boys and this situation dramatically make them disappointed or some children are talented in brain sports such as chess not in physical sports. I believe children's skills have to be analyzed by the experts one sport course could be recommended after a complete survey and also, various sports courses which covered children's favorites must be held by schools. On the other hand, a number of people agree with the mandatory courses in fact they think doing compulsory physical practices will teach them how to adapt themselves with an unintentional situation and it is increasingly useful for the developmental period. I never completely reject this belief, but I think a balanced view has to manage the compulsory and optional sports activities of children. To sum up, having a dynamic and healthy generation in the future specifically needs a great attention to their physical activities in childhood. I have found that this matter could be done by targeted sports courses and plans in schools and children have to know their sports skills and choose a certain sport based on interest and ability.
Nowadays, due to the reduction of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
mandatory
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
courses
are appropriate for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
up this neglected part of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. Although I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extent, in my view these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be chosen
based on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
and mental abilities and interest factor for each student.

Numerous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
the new generation have always disagreed with involuntary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
mostly
do an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activity
based on their interests. Nowadays, convincing a child immersed in the virtual world and online games to participate in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
courses
is
profoundly
difficult.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
and mental abilities.
For example
, playing basketball is not an appropriate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
for short boys and this situation
dramatically
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them disappointed or
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are talented
in brain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
such as chess not in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
. I believe children's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
be analyzed
by the experts one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
could
be recommended
after a complete survey and
also
, various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
courses
which covered children's favorites
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be held
by schools.

On the other hand
, a number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the mandatory
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
courses
in fact they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
doing compulsory
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
practices will teach them how to adapt themselves with an unintentional situation and it is
increasingly
useful for the developmental period. I never completely reject this belief,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
a balanced view
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
manage the compulsory and optional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
of children.

To sum up, having a dynamic and healthy generation in the future
specifically
needs a great attention to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
in childhood. I have found that this matter could
be done
by targeted
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
courses
and plans in schools and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
know their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and choose a certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
based on interest and ability.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay Nowadays, due to the reduction of physical activities among children, many people believe that some mandatory sports courses are appropriate for children in order to make up this neglected part of their lives.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
300 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts