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Nowadays children s writing and mathematical abilities are affected by computers and calculators Some people argue that we should limit the usage of these tools in schools Do you agree or disagree v.1

Nowadays children s writing and mathematical abilities are affected by computers and calculators Some people argue that we should limit the usage of these tools in schools v. 1
It is undeniable fact that the need of homes is multiplying day by day and the percentage of people searching for vacant lands to build houses is also rising at an alarming rate. But, the actual scenario is that, the open lands were already diminished in the major cities and towns, and the only option available for a majority of the population is looking at the countryside. I strongly believe that people should start living in the villages in order to avoid congestion in already developed cities. First of all, growth of population is the major cause of congestion in living spaces. People are feeling it as a Herculean task to find lands within city limits in order to construct homes. To illustrate, as per the Real Estate Survey 2019, by a renowned MNC, revealed that people are only interested in choosing their residences near to their work locations or in gated communities within the metro proximity. This habit must be changed and this is the time that citizens should really start opting the rural constructions which are also equally well built and facilitated. The other key reason is that the number of migrants moving from villages to metro cities for employment reasons dramatically multiplies every year. Especially, youth are in the rat race to migrate to a developed metropolis and find employment for their survival. In a recent survey by the newspaper Deccan Chronicle, it is evident that fresh graduates are definite in their opinion to migrate to cities and start their career. This scenario obviously states that the number of homes to be occupied will increase at a high rate. To conclude, I opine and assert that the people should start choosing at the back country options to build their homes rather than competing to have one of the urban limits as there is much scope of development in the rural locality these days.
It is undeniable fact that the need of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homes
is multiplying day by day and the percentage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
searching for vacant lands to build
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
is
also
rising at an alarming rate.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, the actual scenario is that, the open lands were already diminished in the major
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
and towns, and the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
option available for a majority of the population is looking at the countryside. I
strongly
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
start
living in the villages in order to avoid congestion in already developed cities.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, growth of population is the major cause of congestion in living spaces.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
are feeling it as a Herculean task to find lands within city limits in order to construct
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homes
. To illustrate, as per the Real Estate Survey 2019, by a renowned
Possible spelling mistake found.
MNC
, revealed that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
interested in choosing their residences near to their work locations or in gated communities within the metro proximity. This habit
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
and this is the time that citizens should
really
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
start
opting the rural constructions which are
also
equally
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
well built
and facilitated.

The other key reason is that the number of migrants moving from villages to metro
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
for employment reasons
dramatically
multiplies every year.
Especially
, youth are in the rat race to migrate to a developed metropolis and find employment for their survival. In a recent survey by the newspaper Deccan Chronicle, it is evident that fresh graduates are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
definite
in their opinion to migrate to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
start
their career. This scenario
obviously
states that the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homes
to
be occupied
will increase at a high rate.

To conclude
, I opine and assert that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
start
choosing at the back country options to build their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homes
rather
than competing to have one of the urban limits as there is much scope of development in the rural locality these days.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Nowadays children s writing and mathematical abilities are affected by computers and calculators Some people argue that we should limit the usage of these tools in schools v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
316 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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