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Nowadays a large amount of advertisements is aimed at children so some people think there are lot of negativity effects on children or should ban it to what extend so you agree or disagree

Nowadays a large amount of advertisements is aimed at children so some people think there are lot of negativity effects on children or should ban it to what extend so you agree or disagree 1Bkq
The advertisement key part of modern society some masses believe that it should be banned because it’s negative effects on children but others argue that it should be banned from my perspective, it’s more positive effects outweigh the negatives so it’s should not be closed now, I will explain my point of view in this subsequent paragraphs. To set the wheel in motion, there are plethora of reason behind this the adverts positive effects on human life the first and foremost point is this, it’s best source of knowledge because through the notice everyone enhance their knowledge related to products that are launched in our world. secondly, it’s beneficial for the human because it’s best way to reduce the unemployment for instance, when companies invent the new advertising they are need many employes so it’s provide lot of job opportunities. Further more, adverts are best for human because after watching the advertisements they have lots of choice regarding to product. In this way, they can chose any product according to their choice. On the otherside, the advertisement have lot of drawbacks. The unhealthy food advertisements create negative effects on individual life specially it’s negative effect on child health because the young ones can easily influence through ads. Beside this, the companies basically force on child products advertisements but it’s bad for adults because they are demand these thing and for this create problems with their parents. To conclude it crystal clear that, the unhealthy or child products some time create negative effects on child otherwise it’s best.
The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
key part of modern society
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
masses believe that it should
be banned
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
negative
effects on children
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
others argue that it should
be banned
from my perspective, it’s more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effects outweigh the negatives
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it’s should not
be closed
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
, I will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
my point of view in this subsequent paragraphs. To set the wheel in motion, there are plethora of reason behind this the adverts
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effects on human life the
first
and foremost point is this, it’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
best
source of knowledge
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
through the notice everyone enhance their knowledge related to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
that
are launched
in our world.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
secondly
, it’s beneficial for the human
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it’s
Please check whether an article is missing: "the best".
best
way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the unemployment
for instance
, when
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
invent the new advertising they
are need
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "employs", the plural form of the noun 'employ'?
employes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it’s provide
It seems that an article is missing.
lot of
job opportunities.
Further
more, adverts are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
best
for human
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
after watching the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
they have lots of choice
The phrase 'regarding to' is not correct. Use "regarding" or "regard to".
regarding to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
. In this way, they can
The verb 'can' requires the base form of the verb: "choose"
chose
any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
according to their choice. On the
Possible spelling mistake found.
otherside
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
have lot of drawbacks. The unhealthy food
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
create
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
negative
effects on individual life
specially
it’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
negative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
effect
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
health
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the young ones can
easily
influence through ads. Beside this, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
basically
force on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it’s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
for adults
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are demand
Did you mean "this thing" or "these things"?
these thing
and for this create problems with their parents.
To conclude
it crystal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that, the unhealthy or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Did you mean "times"?
time
create
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
negative
effects on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
otherwise
it’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
best
.
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IELTS essay Nowadays a large amount of advertisements is aimed at children so some people think there are lot of negativity effects on children or should ban it to what extend so you agree or disagree

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
257 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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