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News on internet vs TV or newspaper

News on internet vs TV or newspaper 9lQ00
The internet is rapidly changing every sphere of our lives even for smallest activities. Advanced techniques and computerization have enabled sharing of information in fastest way possible. News and print media are also able to leverage internet to its maximum potential. Due to the World Wide Web quick reachability to maximum audience in shortest span of time, society is shifting towards online news. I think it’s a positive development keeping in mind the current needs of human beings. Following paragraphs will discuss in detail why online news is in demand by most users. First of all, the main reason why most people like to receive news online is, their hectic lives. People don’t have time to sit and watch TV or read newspapers, and even eat. We see many people having food in their hand and running to catch buses, trains, metro etc. on the their way to required destinations. Hence online news comes handy in such cases. They can read it at their own convenience, rather than newspaper to arrive or news timings to match with their schedule. Although newspapers and TV still hold a great significance in places, where internet is not readily available. Next major factor is latency by newspaper and TV in sharing the news. By that time, you get newspaper next day in hand, news is already stale. With the internet, we get notified of any event immediately that happens across the world. Let’s take an example of an earthquake that occurred at certain part of the world, then we can receive this news within seconds. Similarly, tv channels also observe some delay in broadcasting the news, as it involves their reporters and cameraman to reach the required site. In conclusion, I would say online news is best fit for today’s era. It is definitely more beneficial as compared to newspapers and TV.
The internet is
rapidly
changing every sphere of our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
even for smallest activities. Advanced techniques and computerization have enabled sharing of information in
A determiner is probably missing here: "the fastest".
fastest
way possible.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
News
and print media are
also
able to leverage internet to its maximum potential. Due to the World Wide Web quick
Possible spelling mistake found.
reachability
to maximum audience in
A determiner is probably missing here: "the shortest".
shortest
span of time, society is shifting towards
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
it’s a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
development keeping in mind the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
needs of human beings. Following paragraphs will discuss in detail why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
is in demand by most users.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, the main reason why most
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
like to receive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
is, their hectic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
don’t have time to sit and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
TV or read
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
, and even eat. We
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
having food in their hand and running to catch buses, trains, metro etc. on
A determiner cannot combine with a possessive pronoun. Did you mean simply "their way" or "the way"?
the their way
to required destinations.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Hence
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
handy in such cases. They can read it at their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
convenience,
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspaper
to arrive or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
timings to match with their schedule. Although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
and TV
still
hold a great significance in places, where internet is not
readily
available.

Next
major factor is latency by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspaper
and TV in sharing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
. By that time, you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspaper
next
day in hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
is already stale. With the internet, we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
notified of any
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
event
immediately that happens across the world.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Let
’s take an example of an earthquake that occurred at certain part of the world, then we can receive this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
within seconds.
Similarly
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
tv
channels
also
observe
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
delay in broadcasting the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
, as it involves their reporters and cameraman to reach the required site.

In conclusion
, I would say
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
is best fit for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s era. It is definitely more beneficial as compared to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
and TV.
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IELTS essay News on internet vs TV or newspaper

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
308 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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