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negative aspects of television in a child's life.

negative aspects of television in a child's life. KYqM3
There are countless adverse impacts of television on children's life. To begin with, television results in eye strain. It emits a great deal of blue light, which negatively affects children's eyes. Moreover, heavy exposure to TV can lead to full-blown addiction. Being addicted to television may put children at high risk of poor performance at school. Besides, excessive television consumption easily causes health-related problems. Many children in the UK spend at least 5 hours sitting in front of the TV and doing nothing. This is one of the principal causes of obesity and diabetes. Last but not least, Television hs an adverse impact on children's attitudes. Some television progammes and movies contain violent scene, which are inappropriate for children. They might imitate the violent behaviour and become bullies. In conclusion, I believe that parents should put a strict limit on their children's television consumption.
There are countless adverse impacts of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children's
life. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
results in eye strain. It emits a great deal of blue light, which
negatively
affects
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children's
eyes.
Moreover
, heavy exposure to TV can lead to full-blown addiction.
Being addicted
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
may put children at high
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
of poor performance at school.
Besides
, excessive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
consumption
easily
causes health-related problems.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
children in the UK spend at least 5 hours sitting in front of the TV and doing nothing. This is one of the principal causes of obesity and diabetes. Last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not least,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Television
Possible spelling mistake found.
hs
an adverse impact on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children's
attitudes.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
Possible spelling mistake found.
progammes
and movies contain violent scene, which are inappropriate for children. They might imitate the violent
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
and become bullies.
In conclusion
, I believe that parents should put a strict limit on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
consumption.

IELTS essay negative aspects of television in a child's life.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
144 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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