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national and international touism

national and international touism BYYaX
Tourism is one of the most impactful smokeless industries in the past century due to the amount of money it is able to generate. However, as many regions have started to experience the negative impacts, the benefits and drawbacks of this sector are being weighed against each other. From my perspective, tourism has done more harm than good for a number of areas and this essay will discuss the reasons for that. It is first essential to acknowledge that tourism has done wonders for many economies by boosting revenue and creating jobs for the locals. Especially for numerous cities which are designed solely for this type of business, tourists are the only source of income for the people and can make or break their livelihood. For example, there have been cases of villages in Thailand and the Philippines being saved by the sheer influx of foreign travellers. Furthermore, even for big capitals like Shanghai or Paris, the industry still generates millions of jobs for the citizens. The benefits of tourism are therefore undeniable. Nonetheless, the industry also destroys the environment due to the waste that it produces. For instance, every year, thousands of tons of carbon dioxide are being emitted into the atmosphere by aeroplanes while tons of rubbish are being disposed of by visitors. In the countryside, the lack of environmental awareness from the side of travellers has wreaked havoc on the natural resources, causing soil erosion and water pollution. Moreover, immoral and unsustainable travelling practices such as trophy hunting put a strain on endangered species and throw our ecology systems off balance. To exemplify, many African countries have to prohibit safari touristry and hunting due to the critical situation of numerous wild animals. In conclusion, tourism is detrimental to the environment because of the sheer amount of waste and pollution it has created. The repercussions of such an impact are so great that they even overshadow the economic gains which this industry has brought to countless regions.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Tourism
is one of the most impactful smokeless
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industries
in the past century due to the amount of money it is able to generate.
However
, as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
regions have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to experience the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impacts, the benefits and drawbacks of this sector are
being weighed
against each other. From my perspective,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
has done more harm than
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for a number of areas and this essay will discuss the reasons for that.

It is
first
essential to acknowledge that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
has done wonders for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
economies by boosting revenue and creating jobs for the locals.
Especially
for numerous cities which
are designed
solely
for this type of business, tourists are the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
source of income for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
and can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
or break their livelihood.
For example
, there have been cases of villages in Thailand and the Philippines
being saved
by the sheer influx of foreign
Possible spelling mistake found.
travellers
.
Furthermore
, even for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
capitals like Shanghai or Paris, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
still
generates millions of jobs for the citizens. The benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
are
therefore
undeniable.

Nonetheless, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroys
the environment due to the waste that it produces.
For instance
, every year, thousands of tons of carbon dioxide are
being emitted
into the atmosphere by
Possible spelling mistake. 'aeroplanes' is British English.
aeroplanes
while tons of rubbish are
being disposed
of by visitors. In the countryside, the lack of environmental awareness from the side of
Possible spelling mistake found.
travellers
has wreaked havoc on the natural resources, causing soil erosion and water pollution.
Moreover
, immoral and unsustainable travelling practices such as trophy hunting put a strain on endangered species and throw our ecology systems off balance. To exemplify,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
African countries
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
prohibit safari
Possible spelling mistake found.
touristry
and hunting due to the critical situation of numerous wild animals.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
is detrimental to the environment
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the sheer amount of waste and pollution it has created. The repercussions of such an impact are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
great that they even overshadow the economic gains which this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
has brought to countless regions.
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IELTS essay national and international touism

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
329 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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