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My first adorable teacher

My first adorable teacher eeLQK
When I began learning Persian language at the University several years ago, I was introduced to Gulnara Sultan, the University's teacher. Her quick-witted appearance and bright facial expression made her like a very good teacher. In her middle-aged, she was a petite woman, with sparkling brown eyes, straight silver hair, and upturned nose. Like many Persian people, she had a great style of dress, sho she always looked well-dressed even in casual clothes. She was a righteous person who treated everyone with equal respect. It seemed that she had tremendous patient and stableness. Moreover, her pleasant voice and unobtrusive manner made her be a perfect individual. In addition to this, she was popular because of her ability to teach students. To sum up, Gulnara Sultan was dedicated her entire life to science. She became both a stunning woman and fantastic mentor, as well.
When I began learning Persian language at the University several years ago, I
was introduced
to
Possible spelling mistake found.
Gulnara
Sultan, the University's teacher. Her quick-witted appearance and bright facial expression made her like a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
teacher. In her middle-aged, she was a petite woman, with sparkling brown eyes, straight silver hair, and upturned nose. Like
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
Persian
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, she had a great style of dress,
Possible spelling mistake found.
sho
she always looked well-dressed even in casual clothes. She was a righteous person who treated everyone with equal respect. It seemed that she had tremendous patient and
Possible spelling mistake found.
stableness
.
Moreover
, her pleasant voice and unobtrusive manner made her be a perfect individual.
In addition
to this, she was popular
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of her ability to teach students. To sum up,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Gulnara
Sultan
was dedicated
her entire life to science. She became both a stunning woman and fantastic mentor,
as well
.
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IELTS essay My first adorable teacher

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
143 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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