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My childhood periods with my family

My childhood periods with my family YwNRn
During my childhood, I was living in Riyadh with my family. My family contest of three brothers and two sisters. I complete my study at King said university in nursing college. Before 10 years there was dramatic change occur in our family, which was my father died. Everythings have been changed due to his absence. We became more responsible no one behind us to protect and correct our mistakes. In 2010 I got married from a man who was one of our relatives, unfortunately, it didn't work ought to I had got divorce even, I have three children cosequently, I am the one who takes care of them finally, I am so glade to have them.
During my childhood, I was living in Riyadh with my family. My family contest of three brothers and two sisters. I complete my study at King said university in nursing college.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Before
10 years there was dramatic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
occur in our family, which was my father
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
died
.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Everythings have
been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
due to his absence. We became more responsible no one behind us to protect and correct our mistakes. In
The comma is probably missing here: "2010, I".
2010 I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
married from a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
who was one of our relatives, unfortunately, it didn't work ought to I had
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
divorce even, I have three children
Possible spelling mistake found.
cosequently
, I am the one who takes care of them
finally
, I am
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
glade to have them.
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IELTS essay My childhood periods with my family

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
116 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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