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Museums are considered as one of the must-go attractions in any cities in the world.

Museums are considered as one of the must-go attractions in any cities in the world. m29AA
Museums are considered as one of the must-go attractions in any cities in the world. Whilst some museums are free to access, there are some that request a ticket for the entrance. From my personal perspective, I contend that the drawbacks of charging fee are outweighed by its merits. On the one hand, having to purchase tickets before visiting the museums are detrimental for both museums itself and the visitors for a combination of reasons. In the first place, this approach will discourage the tourists to spend their precious time on visiting museums, especially with the impoverished. For instance, some artistic museums offer unaffordable prices, therefore, not a numerous citizen has opportunity to broaden their horizons in terms of science, history, art and other vital subjects. In addition, from the perspective of museums, they will soon have to close their business as visitors decline. On the other hand, I am of the opinion that the positive aspects of selling tickets for visitors eclipsed its disadvantages. The primary rationale is the money obtaining from visitors that covers the museums to operate sustainably in the long run. For example, monetary profits from tickets can be used to pay water, electricity bills monthly. Also, maintaining a museum requires tremendous personnel as well as guiders, which consume a large monthly expenditure. Another compelling factor is that museums’ managers depend on revenue to enhance the amount of masterpieces exhibited for tourists. As a result, revenue plays a key role in determining the existence of museums. In conclusion, selling tickets can be attributed to the museums’ survival. Personally, museums should retain making money from tickets purchased by visitors but with appropriate prices and to subsidize the entrance fee for local citizens or children.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Museums
are considered
as one of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
-go attractions in any cities in the world. Whilst
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
are free to access, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
that request a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ticket
for the entrance. From my personal perspective, I contend that the drawbacks of charging fee
are outweighed
by its merits.

On the one hand, having to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tickets
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
visiting the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
are detrimental for both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
itself and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
for a combination of reasons. In the
first
place, this approach will discourage the tourists to spend their precious time on visiting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
,
especially
with the impoverished.
For instance
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
artistic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
offer unaffordable prices,
therefore
, not a numerous citizen has opportunity to broaden their horizons in terms of science, history, art and other vital subjects.
In addition
, from the perspective of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
, they will
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
close their business as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
decline.

On the other hand
, I am of the opinion that the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
aspects of selling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tickets
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
eclipsed its disadvantages. The primary rationale is the money obtaining from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
that covers the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
to operate
sustainably
in the long run.
For example
, monetary profits from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tickets
can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to pay water, electricity bills monthly.
Also
, maintaining a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
requires tremendous personnel
as well
as guiders, which consume a large monthly expenditure. Another compelling factor is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums’
managers depend on revenue to enhance the amount of masterpieces exhibited for tourists.
As a result
, revenue plays a key role in determining the existence of museums.

In conclusion
, selling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tickets
can
be attributed
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums’
survival.
Personally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
should retain making money from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tickets
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchased
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
with appropriate prices and to subsidize the entrance fee for local citizens or children.
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IELTS essay Museums are considered as one of the must-go attractions in any cities in the world.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
287 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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