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Museums and art galleries should concentrate on works that show history and culture of their own country rather than works of the other parts in the world. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Museums and art galleries should concentrate on works that show history and culture of their own country rather than works of the other parts in the world. k7WK
Museums and art galleries have played a major role in preserving and conveying historical values for a long time. While many people suggest that they should focus purely on displaying works that represent the nation’s culture and history, others with contradicting views affirm that international works are also of great worth. Personally, I think both viewpoints are equally valid. On the one hand, there are reasons why it is believed that artifacts and works of national value should be given priority. Firstly, museums and art galleries should be places that honor indigenous history and culture. By going to these museums and galleries, people will gain a deeper understanding of their nation, along with the golden ages and hard times that the country has been through. The exhibitions therefore serve an educational purpose as they instill patriotism and promote a sense of national pride in the citizens of that country. Apart from that, such places also help to preserve traditional and historical values. In the 21st century, many minority ethnic groups are in grave danger of losing their culture, and therefore, the display of their works and artifacts will help to preserve their culture and the cultural diversity of a nation. On the other hand, showing international works of art has several merits. Works from other parts of the world help to diversify the content of museums and art galleries. Admittedly, even though the value of museums and art galleries cannot be denied, their failure in adopting changes and updating collections has discouraged people from visiting these places. For that reason, international works will add appeal and aid museums and galleries in attracting more visitors. Furthermore, if museums display international works, people will have more chance to gain knowledge and insight into other cultures as well. In conclusion, the ultimate goal of museums and galleries is to spread knowledge and wonder far and wide. Therefore, my suggestion is that local artifacts and works should be prioritized, while those of other nations can still be exhibited but in separate museums and galleries.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Museums
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
galleries
have played a major role in preserving and conveying historical values for a long time. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
suggest that they should focus
purely
on displaying works that represent the nation’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
and history, others with contradicting views affirm that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
works are
also
of great worth.
Personally
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
both viewpoints are
equally
valid.

On the one hand, there are reasons why it
is believed
that artifacts and works of national
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
value
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
priority.
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
galleries
should be places that honor indigenous history and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
. By going to these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
galleries
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will gain a deeper understanding of their nation, along with the golden ages and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
times that the country has been through. The exhibitions
therefore
serve an educational purpose as they instill patriotism and promote a sense of national pride in the citizens of that country. Apart from that, such places
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to preserve traditional and historical values. In the 21st century,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
minority ethnic groups are in grave
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
danger
of losing their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
, and
therefore
, the display of their works and artifacts will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to preserve their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
and the cultural diversity of a nation.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, showing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
works of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
has several merits. Works from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
parts of the world
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to diversify the content of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
galleries
.
Admittedly
,
even though
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
value
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
galleries
cannot
be denied
, their failure in adopting
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
and updating collections has discouraged
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from visiting these places. For that reason,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
works will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
appeal and aid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
galleries
in attracting more visitors.
Furthermore
, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
display
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
works,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will have more chance to gain knowledge and insight into
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
as well
.

In conclusion
, the ultimate goal of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
galleries
is to spread knowledge and wonder far and wide.
Therefore
, my suggestion is that local artifacts and works should
be prioritized
, while those of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
nations can
still
be exhibited
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in separate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
galleries
.
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IELTS essay Museums and art galleries should concentrate on works that show history and culture of their own country rather than works of the other parts in the world.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
340 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
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  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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