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Museum should display art of their own country,or they should display art from all over the world. To what extend do you agree or disagree.

Museum should display art of their own country, or they should display art from all over the world. aANY9
Museum plays a vital role in every country. Nowadays, museums are there in each and every cities. Its displays cultural and historical things. It has became the oldest place to visit. It has been from centuries I partly agree with the statement, although people are anxious to know more about their country they have the right to know about other countries. Firstly, each an every person needs to know more and more about their country. Many people have their idols who sacrificed their lives for the country. Museum should display art of their own country separately, as anyone will be excited to know vastly about it. It also represent our history, so proudlly the youngster can get motivated and learn from it and show a huge respect. For example, there is a museum in pune in which there is a statue of mahatma gandhi which has became a worship. There a person also guides about his belongings, and give information of his story of how he inspired many people. Secondly, it is party important to know things or art about different regions In present, children are quite smart due to electronics. They have an eager to get more knowledge from each part of the world. As students in the schoolling education have been taught about every art, students need to upgrade themselves. Moreover, the children mostly visting abroad for their studies, it will be helpful to gain knowledge, learn cultures and also the history behind every things. Beside that, there can be lack of awareness, if any of the person is obsessed with one country which is not so popular in the foreign countries. For example, a tourist visited our country India, knew a lot of museums, cultures. Later, when he started speaking on his country, we will be dumb or blank in front of them. So, it is necessary to gain understanding and a museum of all countries. Overall, i belive museums and art galleries should be there individually, own country and other countries museum should be built separately, so whomsoever wants to visit can go and have their precious moments.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Museum
plays a vital role in every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. Nowadays,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
are there in each and every
The noun should be probably in the singular form: "city"?
cities
. Its displays cultural and historical things. It has
Use past participle here: "become".
became
the oldest place to visit. It has been from centuries I partly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the statement, although
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are anxious to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
know
more about their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
they have the right to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
know
about other countries.

Firstly
, each an every person needs to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
know
more and more about their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have their idols who sacrificed their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Museum
should display
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
separately
, as anyone will
be excited
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
know
vastly
about it. It
also
Did you mean "represents"?
represent
our history,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
Possible spelling mistake found.
proudlly
the youngster can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
motivated and learn from it and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
a huge respect.
For example
, there is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
pune
in which there is a statue of mahatma
Possible spelling mistake found.
gandhi
which has
Use past participle here: "become".
became
a worship. There a person
also
guides about his belongings, and give information of his story of how he inspired
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

Secondly
, it is party
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
know
things or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
about
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
regions In present, children are quite smart due to electronics. They have an eager to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more knowledge from each part of the world. As students in the
Possible spelling mistake found.
schoolling
education have
been taught
about every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
, students need to upgrade themselves.
Moreover
, the children
mostly
Possible spelling mistake found.
visting
abroad for their studies, it will be helpful to gain knowledge, learn cultures and
also
the history behind every
The noun should be probably in the singular form: "thing"?
things
. Beside that, there can be lack of awareness, if any of the person
is obsessed
with one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
which is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
popular in the foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
.
For example
, a tourist visited our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
India, knew
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
, cultures. Later, when he
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
speaking on his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
, we will be dumb or blank in front of them.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, it is necessary to gain understanding and a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
of all countries.

Overall
, i
Possible spelling mistake found.
belive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
galleries should be there
individually
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
and other
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "countries'" or "country's"?
countries
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
should
be built
separately
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
whomsoever wants to visit can go and have their precious moments.
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IELTS essay Museum should display art of their own country, or they should display art from all over the world.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
352 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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