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Inevitably, all celebs are nowadays known for their glamorous lifestyle, whilst all their hardwork and patience that took them to where they are is being ignored by mellenials. Moreover, I completely agree that this sets a not so good example for younger generations. 

Inevitably, all celebs are nowadays known for their glamorous lifestyle, whilst all their hardwork and patience that took them to where they are is being ignored by mellenials. Moreover, I completely agree that this sets a not so good example for younger generations. D2xEp
Inevitably, all celebs nowadays are known for their glamorous lifestyle, whilst all their hardwork and patience that took them to now what they are is being ignored by millenials. Moreover I completely agree that this sets a not so good example for younger genration. To begin with, all the superstars are used by Tv commercials to advertise their products as there is a belief that whatever they will use is good for the other people. Coming generations think that to be succesful they have to be famous and for that they need a good body with beauty like celebrities. However, they overlook the fact that all the famous people have worked so hard to get all the idealism. For instance, if i talk about about Justin bieber younger people idealise him and talk about how rich almighty he is, but no one talks about how young he started to get all this fame and money he has currently. Furthermore,
Inevitably
, all celebs nowadays
are known
for their glamorous lifestyle, whilst all their
Possible spelling mistake found.
hardwork
and patience that took them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
what they are is being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignored
by
Possible spelling mistake found.
millenials
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Moreover
I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that this sets a not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
example for younger
Possible spelling mistake found.
genration
.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, all the superstars are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
by
Possible spelling mistake found.
Tv
commercials to advertise their products as there is a belief that whatever they will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for the other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
. Coming generations
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that to be
Possible spelling mistake found.
succesful
they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
and for that they need a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
body with beauty like celebrities.
However
, they overlook the fact that all the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have worked
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
all the idealism.
For instance
, if
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
talk
Possible typo: you repeated a word
about about
Justin
Possible spelling mistake found.
bieber
younger
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
Possible spelling mistake. 'idealise' is British English.
idealise
him and talk about how rich almighty he is,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
no one talks about how young he
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
all this fame and money he has
currently
.

Furthermore
,
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IELTS essay Inevitably, all celebs are nowadays known for their glamorous lifestyle, whilst all their hardwork and patience that took them to where they are is being ignored by mellenials. Moreover, I completely agree that this sets a not so good example for younger generations.

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
159 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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