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Modern technology has greatly influenced people's ways of entertainment, making people less creative. Do you agree or disagree?

Modern technology has greatly influenced people's ways of entertainment, making people less creative. weDNd
However, in any case, that advancement is facilitating people to interact via a plethora of communication network, accessing multiple sources of information, thus helping people develop creation in entertainment or other aspect. For example, in the past, movie, music or games are not a trend and less people know about that, so doing something new is a big problem with anybody. But now, when a film releases, although it is not by a famous creator, it still can be a trend, due to that, people are allowed to do their own interest and creative freedom. Therefore, nowadays, a huge product is debuted in new a new way, much more creative and sometimes it can be weird, basically, creating in a own way is a trend.
However
, in any case, that advancement is facilitating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to interact via a plethora of communication network, accessing multiple sources of information,
thus
helping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
develop creation in entertainment or other aspect.
For example
, in the past, movie, music or games are not a trend and
Did you mean "fewer"? The noun people is countable.
less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
know about that,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
doing something new is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
problem with anybody.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
, when a film releases, although it is not by a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
creator, it
still
can be a trend, due to that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to do their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
interest and creative freedom.
Therefore
, nowadays, a huge product
is debuted
in new a new way, much more creative and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
it can be weird,
basically
, creating in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
way is a trend.
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IELTS essay Modern technology has greatly influenced people's ways of entertainment, making people less creative.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
125 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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